The dreams come in jagged pieces, shards of sound and light with no sense of time.
First, there’s black water again. A shoreline under a violet sky. Serenya’s hand gripping mine as the waves roared closer.
We’re out of time, Kallan.
I jerk awake, breath catching, her voice vibrating in my bones. The room is dark, too still, save for the faint drip of water in some far corner. My ribs hurt from the sudden movement. I close my eyes again.
The next dream is sharper, burning too real. The clang of steel. Fire licking up a broken wall. Serenya whirls beside me, braid shorter now, tunic scorched. Shadows flare from her fingers as she blocks a strike that would have taken me down. Her eyes are fierce and wild, like she would tear the world apartbefore she let me fall.
The crack of the blow echoes in my mind when I wake again, pulse racing, breath shallow. My hands fist in the sheets as if I can still feel the hilt of a sword in them.
The third dream is softer. Now there’s no battle or fire, only the quiet light of dawn filtering through the high windows. Serenya stands with her back to me as I fasten a silver clasp at her throat. The gentle, knowing look she gives me over her shoulder makes something in my chest twist.
You can’t keep running from what you are.
Her voice clings to me long after I wake.
I spend the rest of the night twisting and turning under the blankets, ribs aching, mind raw. Every time I close my eyes, the water rises, and Serenya’s voice echoes through my mind.
Come back to me.
By dawn, I can’t stand it anymore.
I drag myself upright, ignoring the sting across my ribs, and shove the blankets aside. The floor is cold under my feet, the air even colder, but the need burning in my chest is worse than both. The halls are hushed, lit only by guttering candles. I brace against the wall and start down the corridor. Each step feels like I’m being torn apart, but I don’t stop. I won’t stop. Not when she’s somewhere in this palace.
Two turns later, a guard steps into my path. The steel of his armor gleams in the low light.
“Back to bed,” he says flatly.
“I need to see her.” My voice is rough, my throat still raw from sleep. “Serenya. Take me to her.”
The guard’s mouth presses into a thin line. “Orders areclear. You’re to remain in the healer’s wing.”
I push past him anyway. Or I try to, at least. Pain flares down my side, nearly making me drop to my knees. A hand clamps on my shoulder, holding me upright, yet still not letting me go further.
Alira’s voice joins, calm but firm. “Koen.”
She walks over to us, arms folded. Her gaze is softer than the guard’s, but unwavering all the same. “I came to check on you. You need to get back in bed. You’re not ready to be walking these halls.”
“I don’t care.” The words rasp out before I can stop them. “I have to see her. Just for a moment.”
Something flickers in Alira’s eyes. Not anger or pity, but something heavier. She shares a look with the guard.
I’mreallystarting to hate those silent exchanges.
“She still needs her rest as much as you do,” Alira says at last. “Go back. Please.”
I want to fight. To demand answers, but the strength drains out of me as quickly as it came, leaving only the trembling in my legs and the throb of pain in my ribs. The guard eases back a step. Alira’s expression softens, almost regretful. “You’ll see her soon enough.”
I don’t believe her. Not fully. I can’t push past her either, though. Not like this. So I let them lead me back, fury and longing tangling in my chest until I can’t tell where one ends and the other begins.
When the door closes again, I sink against the mattress and stare at the ceiling, jaw clenched so tight it hurts. I don’t know why I feel this way, but I know if I don’t see Serenyasoon, something in me will break.
Chapter 30
?---- Koen ? ----?
A few days later, when Lioran and Asbel come to check on me, the healer finally allows me to rise, leaning only slightly on Lioran’s shoulder. Asbel stays close, his calm presence steadying me as we shuffle to the training yard.
