“Iam,” he pants. “You just teach like you’re trying to kill me.”
“Because that’s what the trials will do.”
“You say that like you’re not actually enjoying this.”
I narrow my eyes. “I’m enjoying proving you’re not as clever as you seem to think you are.”
The corner of his mouth twitches. “You think I’m clever?”
I lunge without warning, enjoying watching him scramble to dodge. Our swords echo in the training yard as they clash.
“Gods, you’re insufferable,” I snap.
“And you’re terrifying,” he shoots back, sidestepping neatly. “It’s kinda charming.”
My cheeks burn, betraying warmth I don’t want. “Is flirting with me your way of coping with failure?”
“No,” he parries sharply, stepping closer than I expected. “It’s my way of coping withyou,little shadow.”
I sweep his leg, but he quickly leaps clear—too quick for someone just learning.
“You’re better than when we started,” I admit grudgingly. “Less flailing.”
“I’m thrilled to have reached the ‘not flailing’ milestone,” he replies flatly.
I press into his guard, blades locked between us. His eyes catch mine—golden, intense, and unreadable. My breath stumbles, and my shadows begin to stir.
For a heartbeat, something shifts in his eyes. Recognition? Pain?
He blinks, and it’s gone.
My pulse pounds as I shove him back harder than necessary. He stumbles, dropping his guard.
“Focus,” I bark. “Stop staring.”
“I wasn’t—” he falters, frowning. “I just…I thought…”
“I don’t care.” My voice is sharp. “That’s enough for today. You’re distracted. Fight like that, and you’ll get yourself killed.” My eyes begin to sting, tears threatening to fall.
No, no, no.I haven’t cried in years. Why now?
He stares at me, chest heaving, bewilderment shadowing his features.
My hands begin to shake as I drop my sword to the ground with a clang, then turn, refusing to meet his gaze again. Each step away feels like peeling something raw open inside ofme.
The moment I clear the training yard, and I’m certain he can’t see me, I quicken my pace. By the time I reach the gardens, I’m running. Past the hedges, through the trees, until I burst into the wild stretch of flowers beyond.
My knees hit the earth, and the tears I was trying so hard to hold back spill free.
What was that? Why do my shadows want him? Why do I feel this pull, like threads wanting to bind me to him? What kind of cruel joke are the gods playing on me?
I was finally doing better. I hadn’t wept in years. I stayed within these palace walls, yes, but I’d built a fragile peace.
Now, because of him and this strange feeling I get whenever he’s around, I can’t stop the tears.
The worst part is, he has no idea. No idea of the war inside me. The storm he’s ignited.
If this is how I feel after onlytwo days, how will I survive until the end of the trials?
