CHAPTER 19
Paxon
Wraith crashesinto me and it feels like finding my way home again. He does exactly what I ask, throwing himself into the kiss, exploring my mouth with his tongue and my body with his hands. I melt into him as relief washes over me. Relief from what, I don’t know. I don’t get to have this. Don’t get to keep him. It’s impossible, and it fucking sucks that he’s the first one I’ve wanted to keep in my life.
But how do I get past his profession? How do I sit at home cooking dinner for a man who’s out killing people? How do I reconcile that? I can’t. Right? What does it make me if I do?
“Stop,” Wraith whispers against my lips.
“Stop what?”
“Thinking. There will be plenty of time for that.”
“How did you know?”
He pulls away slightly, gripping the back of my neck. “I just do. Push it all back. We’ll tackle it later, but for now, let me love you.”
My brow crinkles. “Let you love me?”
For the first time, a blush moves up his neck to his cheeks. “I said what I said.”
My chest tightens as my stomach flips. “No. You can’t… love me. It would just make it hurt more.”
Wraith shrugs. “I don’t know about you, but I wasn’t asked first if I wanted to catch feelings. I would’ve declined if I had been. Did anyone ask you?”
I shake my head.
“We don’t have to talk about it. Won’t do any good.” He cups my cheek. “But at least when you walk away from me for the last time, you’ll know that you left your mark.”
Before I can speak, he presses our lips together again and we fall onto his bed. It’s unbelievably soft, cradling my body and making me feel small and cared for. Wraith is right though—our feelings don’t matter. We’re from different worlds and I can’t see any way for them to blend.
“Let me love you, Pax,” Wraith whispers, dragging his lips over my neck until his breath is warming my ear. “Forget everything else but us and this.”
I tangle my fingers in his hair, wanting desperately to record every second of this in my mind so I can always remember a time when, at least for a little while, I was truly happy.
Wraith makes his way down my body, slowly removing my clothes as he covers me with kisses, erasing the anger from earlier. I thought I hurt him, but either he’s hiding it very well or he actually liked it.
“Shh,” he says, covering my skin in more heated kisses.
I lift my hips to help him get my jeans off. He’s worshipping every inch of me right now, kissing, sucking, nibbling little bites into my flesh, and as heat builds in my belly, I push away any thoughts except him, this.
Us.
Fuck, I want to keep this.
I was just getting a glimpse of who he is beyond his profession, and it was compelling. His presence calms me in ways I didn’t know were possible, and I don’t want to let it go. Not yet.
Fuck. I think I’m in love with him.
Is that even possible? Could it be real or am I clinging to the first thing that’s felt good in a long time?
“Oh fuck,” I moan when Wraith sinks his teeth into my thigh.
“I said stop thinking.”
I huff a laugh, nodding. “Sorry.”
“That’s okay. I’m obviously not working hard enough yet.”
