“I want to apologize to you, Miss Bunbury,” he continued.
She turned to look at him. “Whatever for?”
“For burdening you with my secret last night. It was extremely ill-mannered of me. I apologize.”
She bit her lip. “Captain Swift, I haven’t written to Penelope. I—”
He nodded. “I understand. I shouldn’t have asked you to. Another attempt to burden you with my problems. Please accept my apology.”
She smiled at that. “No need to apologize, Captain. And I do hope you believe that I have no intention of telling anyone… what you told me about Penelope… or your brother.”
“Thank you for that, Miss Bunbury. You are very kind. Especially given that it may have been difficult to hear of a broken engagement, considering your circumstances. As for my brother, I…” His thoughts flashed back to the letter from Cassie, the one she’d sent last night. Apparently, she was not in the country. She’d returned to London for some reason. She said she looked forward to seeing him and she’d heard that Donald was missing and might be in danger. Julian wasn’t certain how she’d found out.
“I know you’re worried, Julian,”her letter had read. “I know you love him, you miss him, and I pray that he comes back safe and sound. But I also know that you’re thinking you can’t do it, fill his shoes if it comes to that. And I want you to know that you can. You will. I have every confidence in you.”
Cassie, as always, had got right to the heart of his deepest fear and she’d reassured him. It was just what he’d needed to hear, right when he’d needed to hear it. And it had come from Cassie. Cassie, whom he missed. Cassie, whom he’d yet to see since he’d returned. She was more than a friend. She was…
In love with another man. Possibly Upton. That’s why Upton was making him so blasted angry this evening.
“You needn’t explain, Captain Swift,” Miss Bunbury said, rousing him from his thoughts. “May I ask you something? Something a bit… forward?”
He inclined his head and grinned at her. “I think it’s only fair.”
She took a deep breath. “What made you decide you do not want to become engaged?”
She’d surprised him. He remained silent for a few moments before answering. “The truth is, Miss Bunbury, I pray you do not think me a scoundrel, but I find myself thinking quite a great deal about another lady.”
***
Cass couldn’t breathe. Another lady? Had she heard him correctly? Julian was in love with another lady. Another lady. Not Pen. Could it be? It had to be… her. Cass! Who else could it be? He’d never mentioned anyone else in any of his letters. She struggled to keep her face blank. “I don’t think you’re a scoundrel at all, Captain Swift.” Her stays were cutting into her lungs. She felt hot, cold, dizzy. “I understand, actually. My parents have been pushing me to marry gentlemen I don’t want to for years.”
“Ah, so you do understand?” he replied.
“More than you know,” she whispered.
“Please don’t mistake me. I’ve absolutely nothing but respect for Miss Monroe. It’s just that… We don’t know each other very well—at all, really, and there’s… someone else, whom I’ve come to know quite well. Through her letters…”
Cass closed her eyes, fighting back tears. Itwasher. It was. And now she would have to tell him the truth and only hope that he didn’t hate her. She would tell him her name, fall to her knees and beg him to forgive her. But first, she had to be certain. “Does this woman know you, you… care for her?”
Julian cracked a smile. “Actually, no. Not yet. I haven’t told her anything. I felt it best to end my affiliation with Penelope first.”
Cass nodded. That was so like Julian, ensuring he did the correct things in the correct manner.
He leaned forward and braced his elbows on his knees. “And now, I’m not certain that I’m going to tell her.”
Cass’s brows snapped together. Not certain? Why wasn’t he certain? “You do not expect the lady to return your affection?”
Julian let his head fall into his hands and scrubbed one fist through his burnished hair. “No.”
Cass stopped breathing. “No?” she echoed.
“I attempted to visit her when I was in London. And I learned… I discovered…”
Cass’s heart was nearly thumping out of her chest. It was painful. “What?” The word was barely a whisper.
Julian shook his head. “It seems she’s in love with another man.”
CHAPTER TWENTY
