“Why would I want to know anything about them?” He shook his head, looking a bit perturbed at her for asking. “They don’t exactly teach you such things atCambridge.” He laughed uproariously atthat, for some inexplicable reason.
Julianna expelled her breath. Something told her that if she continued down this path, she would find herself more disappointed. She might as well bring up the subject that she’d asked him here to discuss.
She folded her hands together carefully and took a deep breath. “Is it true that you asked my father to move up our wedding date?”
Murdock blinked at her. “Who told you that?”
“Uh…I heard it through Lord Clayton.” There, that was somewhat true.
“I see. I didn’t realize Clayton was in the habit of repeating things inprivateletters.” Murdock seemed angry again.
“I didn’t know you were coming here, either,” she replied, a bit put off by the fact that instead of admitting what he’d done, he was blaming Lord Clayton for her finding out about it.
“I wanted to surprise you, my dear,” he said, but the worddearsounded flat and unemotional. It made her uncomfortable.
She tried to smile, but the muscles in her cheeks wouldn’t cooperate. “I don’t understand why you couldn’t wait to see me back in London.”
He lifted both brows. “You don’t want to see me?” His tone sounded hurt.
“I didn’t say that.” Bless it. This conversation was taking a turn for the worse. She needed to get back to the point. “I merely wondered why you’d choose to try to move up the wedding without askingmefirst.”
His bark of laugher bounced off the windowpane. “I didn’t realize I neededyourpermission.”
Julianna’s brows shot up. “Pardon?” He hadn’t truly just said that, had he? In her family, her parents were well aware of the roles they each played, but her father never did anything without consulting with her mother first. It was a sign of respect as far as Julianna was concerned, and she knew her parents felt the same way about it.
“It would have been a nice courtesy,” Julianna continued, doing her best not to grit her teeth. “Am I to have no say in our wedding plans? Besides, Father will simply discuss it with Mother who will discuss it with me.”
“Well,that’squite unusual,” Murdock replied, tugging at his coat again. His tone had turned imperious.
Julianna blinked. “What is?”
“A duke asking hiswifefor permission,” came Murdock’s pompous reply.
Julianna crossed her arms over her chest. “He doesn’t ask for permission. He asks for heropinion. I see nothing wrong with that.”
“I suppose that’s one way to describe it.” Murdock’s tone had turned icy.
In addition to her folded arms, Julianna began to tap her slipper upon the rug. “Well, I would like to be informed of any changes to the wedding date. We’d planned it for spring, and I think it’s best to keep it there.”
She didn’t want to vocalize the feeling of impending doom that clutched at her chest each time she thought of the wedding date being moved up. The truth was, the fact that it seemed so far off in the future was the reason she’d been feeling good about it till now. The moment she contemplated it happening in a matter of a few short weeks’ time, her heart began to pound, and she felt as if she couldn’t breathe.
Murdock’s frown returned. “We’ll see.” He reached out and patted her shoulder, giving her a complacent smile.
Anger shot through Julianna’s veins. He was clearly trying to placate her. Was this the sort of marriage they would have? One where he patted her and gave her a false smile and she had no say in anything?
“Yes,” Julianna replied, returning his fake-sweet smile with one of her own. “Wewillsee.”
CHAPTER TWENTY-FOUR
Yet again, Julianna couldn’t sleep that night. She tossed and turned, replaying the entire conversation with Lord Murdock in her head. She didn’t even know who he was. She’d been so wrapped up in her mother’s advice to ensure she fulfilled her destiny and became betrothed to the next most eligible man in theton, she hadn’t even stopped to consider whether shewantedto be married to him.
It had all been so easy with Rhys. She’d just assumed it would be easy with any man of her choosing. Murdock met all the measurements after all. He was tall, handsome, well-educated, wealthy, from a good family, possessed of a fine title. He had even been approved by both of her parents, which was something she’d never been able to say for the Duke of Worthington.
But somehow, she was just now getting around to realizing that those things didn’t necessarily mean that her marriage would be a pleasant one. Her time with Rhys had been so different. They’d gone riding, talked, laughed about things, and even kissed (and more) in his study. He’d fulfilled all of the measurements as well (save for Papa’s general disapproval).
But with Rhys, those things weren’t what had made her like him so much. He’d actually been smart and funny and good company. She was beginning to fear that not only was Murdock neither funny nor good company, he showed signs of being domineering and arrogant. Rhys was arrogant too, of course, but in a charming way. Not in a way in which she wanted to strangle him, as she’d been tempted to with Lord Murdock in the drawing room earlier.
She needed to get away and think. She could not stay in this house one more day and pretend to be the perfect little debutante. Especially not when Lord Murdock would be following her around, smiling at her. She had no interest in playacting at the moment. She had to leave.
