But the alternative. Doing nothing. Hoping for the best.
That wasn’t something I could live with.
The way she’d looked at me when I’d defended her in that hallway. Not with fear, but with something worse.
Curiosity. Dare I say, gratitude? When was the last time someone looked at me like an asset rather than a liability?
Harper had infected my thoughts like a fever, and I didn’t want the cure.
By morning, I’d made my decision.
Actually, that was bullshit. I’d made it sometime in the middle of the night, staring at the ceiling and counting the hours until I might see her again. My brain just needed a few hours to catch up to what my body already knew.
I couldn’t risk not seeing her again. Sure, a couple of days ago, I’d put in that request to work in the infirmary, but I hadn’t heard back, and even though one of the COs who liked me said he’d put in a good word for me, I wasn’t taking any chances.
After breakfast, after the mandatory count, after pretending to give a damn about anything besides the ticking clock in my head, counting down seventy-two hours since I’d last seen her, I pulled Ronan back into our cell.
“Dude, you okay?” He studied me like I was a math problem he couldn’t solve. “You’ve been weird all morning. Weirder than usual, and that’s saying something.”
“I’m great.” I rolled my shoulders once. “Need you to do me a favor.”
“Yeah? What’s that?”
I tilted my chin up, meeting his eyes straight on. No point in dancing around it.
“Need you to punch me. Hard as you can. Right in the face.”
Ronan blinked. Once. Twice. “The fuck?”
“You heard me.”
“Knox, man, I’m not gonna?—”
“Fine.” I turned toward the cell door. “I’ll ask Bulldog. I’m sure he’d love the free shot.”
“Wait!” Ronan grabbed my arm, then immediately let go when I looked down at his hand. Smart man. “Why? Why would you want … Jesus, Knox. This is about her, isn’t it? The nurse?”
I went perfectly still. That dangerous kind of still that made other inmates step back.
“Just do it.”
“This is insane. You’re insane.”
Maybe. Probably. Definitely.
But soon, the COs would do their rounds. And if my face happened to need medical attention, well …
Protocol was protocol.
“Ronan.” My voice dropped to that register that meant business. “I’m asking nicely. Once.”
He swallowed hard, shifted his weight. “This is the stupidest thing you’ve ever asked me to do.”
“No.” I positioned myself, hands loose at my sides. “The stupidest thing would be making me ask twice.”
Ronan’s fist connected with my jaw a second later.
Pain exploded across my face, copper flooding my mouth.Perfect.
