She wrinkled her nose. “Nope.”
“Hmm,” he said softly.
If she had lived here with Jace, they would have given the couch a try long ago. As well as most of the other furniture. Was he imagining alternate histories for them right now, too? His eyes sparkled with pleasure. She rested a hand on his bicep, and he let out something between a sigh and a groan. God, it felt so good to be close to him again.
Then his smile faded. He raised a hand to her cheek, the way he had when he kissed her the day before in her doorway, and for a moment she thought he was going to kiss her again. But he didn’t. There was plenty of heat in his gaze, but there was something more, too. Creases formed in his brow.
“You’re not married anymore,” he whispered.
She shook her head slowly.
“But you split up not that long ago.”
It wasn’t a question. What did he want to know? Was he wondering whether she was still hung up on Darren? This wasn’t her favorite topic.
“You sure you want to talk about it?” she asked.
Jace chuckled. “Not sure how to answer that. But, yes, I want to know.”
Behind his laugh, Selena could hear his hesitation. It was hard for him to ask. What could she tell him? That there was a time she thought she loved Darren? That he had admired her drive, at least at first? After the divorce, she had even wondered if she had been attracted to Darren because of just how different he was from Jace. Because she didn’t want to be reminded of him. Because she didn’t want to miss him so badly.
But now she was sitting on Jace’s lap. His arm was wrapped around her, and his hand slowly stroked up and down her side. It felt so good to lean into his warmth, with the rain softly pelting the glass. Trying to explain any of the whys of her relationship with Darren might hurt Jace, even if her relationship with Darren was long over. The closeness between her and Jace was still fragile.
Selena looked away, squinting out into the darkness, weighing her words. “I talked to his new girlfriend when I was in Boston a couple days ago. I dropped by to pick up those packages you brought.”
“Was that hard?” he asked, his voice quiet.
She nodded. “We fought for years about his traveling, and he said he had no control over it. That it was the nature of his job, that I’d known that from the beginning.” She swallowed back the lump in her throat and continued. “But apparently, it wasn’t. Because he got a new job, no travel, just for Lizzie’s kids. And Darren didn’t even want kids.”
She looked over at Jace. His eyes were dark, his gaze probing.
“I’m glad Darren wasn’t there when I stopped by,” she added. “I probably would have said a bunch of things I’d regret.”
That earned her a hint of a smile. “I bet you would.”
“Yeah. Probably double my humiliation level.”
His eyes widened. “Humiliation? Why?”
She shrugged. “That’s what I felt on that day my car broke down. Definitely. But it’s better now.”
His arms tightened around her, and she closed her eyes, sinking into the comfort Jace was offering. Comfort for the mistakes of her marriage to the man she’d chosen over Jace. Was he putting aside his own feelings for her?
Her heart gave a jolt. The Jace she’d known at eighteen wouldn’t have comforted her like this. He couldn’t have. Or maybe her eighteen-year-old self had been too caught up in her own struggles to hear it. But this moment was new, different. They were different. Maybe it was time to clean the slate between them.
Selena bit her lip. “I made some hard choices, Jace. I thought they were the right ones at the time, and now I can’t change them. I just want to make the best of where I am now.”
Her comment was about more than just her marriage. It wasn’t an apology for leaving for college—she wasn’t sorry for that—but she could have handled it differently. If spending time with Jace again felt this good, this right, she needed to move beyond the regrets of her past.
He pulled her closer and kissed her neck, sending rays of heat through her body. The soft lights, Jace’s warm body, and her heart pounding away in her ears all came together in a quiet happiness she hadn’t felt in a long time.
“I made mistakes, too, Selena. Mistakes I wish I could take back,” he said, his voice husky. “It was wrong of me to pressure you to stay in Sacred Harbor.”
She stilled in his arms. After all those months of trying to make him see why she needed to leave for college, all those months of accusations and fighting, this was the last thing she thought she’d hear from him. She turned to meet his gaze. Longing and regret simmered with the heat in his eyes. And maybe she even saw loneliness.
“I don’t regret asking you to marry me,” he said, his voice a low rasp. “But I do regret tying it all together, making you choose between me and college. I just couldn’t imagine four years away from you.”
“I couldn’t imagine it, either,” she whispered. “That’s why I left without saying goodbye. I was afraid I’d change my mind.”
