“So I could, for example, follow you back to Sweden and learn Swedish,” I continued, “find a job, we’d get married—”
I stopped mid-sentence when I saw his smile disappear.
“What is it? The ‘married’ part?” I asked, unable to keep the surprise out of my voice.
Niklas tried to smile again, but his eyes stayed guarded. “No, go on.”
I crossed my arms and frowned. “If we’re having this conversation, we’re having all of it, Niklas.”
He sighed. “Okay. It’s just that in Sweden, lots of couples live together and have kids without getting married. I never really considered a wedding.”
I blinked.
“It happens a lot. It doesn’t mean a couple isn’t committed to each other.”
Niklas ran his hand through his hair and looked out the window, frowning. I took a deep breath, trying to steady my voice.
“And you’re saying you’d like to be one of those people,” I said slowly. “The kind that lives together and has a family without getting married.”
Niklas’s frown deepened. “I don’t know. That’s not what we were going to talk about…”
“… but now you put it out there,” I finished, shaking my head.
Niklas stayed quiet, probably measuring how serious I was about continuing the conversation. He let out his breath and softened his voice.
“After all the shit my parents went through, I just never imagined getting married. I’m not against commitment, and I'm not ruling out marriage. It’s just that in Sweden relationships without marriage are the norm.”
I opened my mouth, but nothing came out. I knew the conversation about our future would be tough, but this? Anti-marriage? First of all, my parents were Catholic. Despite what Niklas said about cultural differences, the only reason I could imagine for an anti-marriage stance was that he hadn’t found the right person yet. Was he the kind of guy who claimed he was against marriage…until he suddenly ran off with some hot yoga teacher?
I tightened my arms around my waist, bracing myself. “Sounds like a woman from Sweden would understand you better.”
I didn’t even try to keep the edge out of my voice. Niklas’s eyes widened, and his mouth pulled into a tight line.
“You asked me what I reacted to, and I told you,” said Niklas, “and now you’re angry with me?”
“Not angry. Surprised is probably more accurate. And sad. I’m not sure what to think.” I rubbed my forehead, trying to process the turn the conversation had just taken. How the hell was I supposed to not take this personally? And how did we get on the topic of marriage anyway? I had decided to push aside wedding thoughts the moment I left Brad. But not forever.
Niklas leaned across the table to touch my cheek. I resisted the instinct to push his hand away. He stroked his thumb over my jaw, and I couldn’t ignore the current this small gesture sent through me. I couldn’t think like this. I leaned further back in my chair, and his hand fell away.
Niklas’s expression hardened. “Caroline, if you forced me to choose between marrying you and losing you, I’d choose marrying you every time.”
“That’s about the worst proposal I’ve ever heard of. Lucky for you, I wouldn’t consider marrying anyone who uses the word ‘forced’ in the same sentence.”
“Shit,” he muttered, his mouth still grim. “That wasn’t a proposal. This isn’t how I meant for this discussion to go.”
“Me neither.”
The corners of his mouth twitched down.
“I already said I want a future with you,” he said. “Everything else is negotiable.”
The sadness in his voice made me feel worse.
“Niklas, let’s just drop the marriage conversation for now,” I said softly. “We’re a long, long way from that point.”
His eyebrows shot up. “Really? What point are we at? Because I’m ready for you to come with me to Sweden. I want—”
I broke in before he could take either of our imaginations further. “What did your agent say today?”
