I frowned. “He’ll probably be a lot less impressed when he hears about the marriage thing.”
My mother didn’t respond.
“I’ll call you soon, Mama,” I whispered and hung up.
I put down my phone and opened up my email. Jess’s contact had come through, and he sounded interested. I clicked on one of the links he had sent to find an image of the pine-covered mountains of New Hampshire rising up behind a quaint strip of shops. The assignment was a travelogue, much like the kind I had done over the summer. But instead of international locations, this project would be used to promote the state of New Hampshire. And it paid better. Much better. My heart beat faster. This was exactly the kind of prospect I was looking for.
I leaned back in my chair and closed my eyes. I visualized myself wandering down the main street in the photo, peeking in stores, biting into a scone at the coffee shop, heading onto the mountain trail for a view of the town from above. We would stay at a little inn. And then…my fantasy came to a full stop. I wasn’t alone in these scenarios. Niklas ate across from me and hiked up the trail with me, and I fell asleep against his warm, hard body.
Except reality wouldn’t work this way. I would go on these trips by myself, and Niklas would stay back in Detroit to play. If he wasn’t on the road himself. I would return to the inn alone at night, and he would come back to his house alone. When I returned to Detroit, what would come next? I’d travel to one place for a project and Niklas would fly somewhere else to play hockey? Was that the kind of life we wanted together?
At the same time, I couldn’t rule out this opportunity simply because it would take me away from Niklas for a month. Making a career decision based on a man went against everything I had set out to do when I left Brad. But after this job, would I continue to leave, again and again, like Jess did?
My phone dinged, breaking into my thoughts. I picked it up and looked at the screen. Brad.
My place at 12
Only four words and the message still managed to irritate me. I had asked him if he could meet me for lunch, and he still was taking control. He hadn’t asked where I wanted to go or when I was available. Yes, I didn’t have any plans these days, but that was beside the point. And he wanted me to come to his place. Our old place.
Niklas’s words from earlier that morning rushed back to her:He’ll go straight for your most vulnerable points. Once again, Niklas had assessed the situation correctly. I could already see how this lunch would unfold, how Brad would try to exploit my doubts.
The difference was that now Brad and I were no longer together. I no longer had to maneuver to get what I wanted from him. All I wanted was to make it clear that Brad and I had no future. And get my jewelry back.
I typed my response.
Café Muse at 12
The Royal Oak café where we had often eaten when we had first moved in together. He would see it as neutral territory, but, really, it wasn’t. For me, it would be a reminder of how much I had changed.
I glanced down at the clock on my computer screen. Almost 11. He had waited to respond, doubtless another calculated move to throw me off, but I was glad. Less time to get worked up about it. I sighed, trying to ignore the knot in my stomach.
*
I opened the garage door, revealing up the little sports car I was supposed to drive. I smiled. I had never felt the least bit of interest in cars, but this one looked promising. Low, sleek and jet-black, the car oozed dangerous style that I had never once identified with—until now. Even if I wasn’t at peace with this new side of my life, I could still have fun with a convertible, couldn’t I?
I ran my hand along the shiny door before opening it, slipping inside. Niklas had given me a run-down on the car and taken down the top for me before he left. But this model was so far from the old Buick I had finally parted from before my trip—so far that it took a few flips through the owner’s manual just to find the ignition. A lot had happened in twenty years of automotive innovation. There wasn’t even a place to stick the key in the ignition anymore.
I pulled the driver’s seat about a foot forward and pressed the button, and the car roared to life. I eased off the clutch. The car lurched back out of the garage and screeched to a stop.Right. Ease the clutch, Caroline.The stick shift was going to take some getting used to, especially with this much horsepower behind it. So much for keeping a low profile in the neighborhood.
On a whim, I had grabbed my camera on the way out the door. I refused to make a trip to Royal Oak only for Brad. If I was taking this step back into my past, at least I could make it work for me, too. Maybe my camera could give some insight into my own life this time, not just other people’s.
The roads I took to Royal Oak were lined with suburbs and strip malls, and not once did I feel the urge to stop. In fact, glancing down at the black bag in the middle of the passenger’s seat, I realized I hadn’t even taken out my camera since I set foot in Detroit. After dragging that bag with me everywhere this summer, I couldn’t ignore my sudden loss in interest. The decisions we faced this week didn’t give me room to think about photography. I had found a calm inside during our summer travels, but it had disappeared when our trip ended.
I wanted it back.
Between my hair blowing in my face and the car’s smooth willingness to double in speed, it took some concentration just to get myself to the café. At least driving took my mind off the sinking feeling in my stomach. But as much as I dreaded seeing Brad, I needed a clean break from him. And I needed to be the one to make it.
The driving was just starting to get fun when I arrived in Royal Oak. I even managed to parallel park outside the restaurant without stalling once. Climbing out of the car, I realized I was smiling.So this was why people spent so much money on cars.
But as I walked into the little restaurant, my smile faded. Brad sat at a table by the window, and his eyes flickered from me to the car outside. I sat down across from him, and Brad’s gaze bore into me.
“If you wanted a flashy car, I would have bought one for you,” said Brad. “And if you like to be roughed up a little, you should have said so. I didn’t realize that’s what you were looking for.”
All the anxiety that had built since I got Brad’s message burst into a jolt of anger. Why the hell had I thought lunch was a good idea? Did he expect me to sit through this kind of attack for an hour? Actually, I didn’t have to.
I stood up. Brad’s eyes widened, as if this were the last thing he had expected me to do, and I tried not to linger on why that was.
“I think I’m already done here, Brad,” I said, keeping my voice low. “I’d like my jewelry, please.”
