“That’s not fair, Simon. Just because we had money doesn’t mean I couldn’t want, too,” she whispered. “I lost my mother, remember? And my father was, well...my father. I have a right to need a family, too.”
Simon rubbed the stubble of his jaw. He was quiet for a while, long enough for her to start regretting her protest. But then he reached for her hand and laced his fingers with hers, stroking her skin gently with his thumb. She closed her eyes. Whatever else happened, this moment was real.
“I’m sorry,” he said after a while. “You’re right. There were things in your life that were hard, too.”
She took a deep breath.
“I was lonely, Simon,” she said. “Really lonely.”
He squeezed her hand.
“I didn’t understand that until the day on the boat,” he said after a moment. “You were so good at covering it up. And you were quite distracting, too.”
Marianna smiled. “That’s a polite way of saying it. What eighteen-year-old refuses sex?”
He wrinkled his brow and snorted. “You think I said yes to everyone who offered?”
“I hope not.” She bit her lip at the thought.
He glanced over at her. “No, Mari. That wasn’t my style. Not then, not now.”
The past and the present swirled in the air around them, both temptation and warning. Oh, how she had missed just being with Simon. It had taken so long to block out this feeling. Years, really. Another truth, and this time she was ready to give it freely. “You know, for a while I hated that you moved on with your life. All those days that we lay in my bed, kissing and talking, it was like they just disappeared. Like they never happened.”
He let go of her hand. His jaw muscles worked, and that impenetrable look was back on his face. Damn.
Then Simon pulled off at the side of the road and turned to her. He rested his hand on her arm. Sparks jumped between them, and she sucked in a breath, but she didn’t look at him.
“Mari?”
“Yes?”
He was waiting for her full attention. She swallowed and turned around. Couldn’t he take off his sunglasses again? His eyes would at least give her a clue about what was going on in his mind. And then he did. His eyes were deep green, alive with the kind of emotion that fed her stupid, relentless hope.
“I didn’t forget any of what happened between us,” he said, his voice low and silky smooth. “I still haven’t forgotten how quickly a man like me can be pulled under by a woman like you. I didn’t forget how you got under my skin and found all my vulnerabilities and made me forget what I was working so hard for.”
His fingers skimmed up her arm and caressed her neck. “But despite all the successes I’ve worked for, you want to know what drives me fucking crazy? What makes my cock ache and my chest twist up in knots?”
She licked her lips. “What?”
“You do,” he said.
He pulled her in and brushed his lips against hers.
“But you already know that, don’t you?”
They sat still, almost touching. He breathed in her closeness, her own breaths. The road, the setting sun, everything else faded away. Just the two of them remained. This was what forever felt like. But it wasn’t forever.
“What are we doing, Simon?” she whispered.
“I don’t know,” he said, tucking her hair behind her ears. “I don’t know.”
