“Walker,” came a stern reprimand as I kept the smile on my face when Raymond appeared. “Come along.”
“Right,” I said as I glanced back to see that the agent who’d led me into the shower was close behind, her expression devoid of emotion. Though, and I might be seeing things, I thought there was a flicker of amusement in her eyes as she followed.
“You shouldn’t antagonize Agent Smith; it wouldn’t’ be in your best interest,” Raymond told me as I was led through the halls of…hell, I couldn’t actually remember where I was. I had been thrown into the back of a van and taken to a plane, then thrown into the back of another van, but that was all I could remember.
“You realize he’s just showing up all the time to harass me, right?” I asked. “Like he’s going to intimidate me.”
“And your attempts to make him think you aren’t bothered could make things harder for you,” Raymond said, stopping at a door. “Including making it difficult for you to have these visits while we await your bail hearing.”
I didn’t like being scolded in front of the agent, but she was posted by the door with the same stoic expression. “Right.”
“Come on in,” he said, leading me into a room that was a marginal upgrade to the interrogation room they had used before. At least the chairs had cushions, and I wasn’t cuffed. “I’m sure you remember your article on the use of donations to veterans to be funneled back into law enforcement budgets?”
“I do,” I said as I took a seat while he remained standing. “That was the one that really got a lot of attention from people. Even ended up with some arrests.”
“Agent Smith’s brother was one of those people arrested,” Raymond told me, raising a brow. “So it would be in your best interest not to poke the already enraged bear.”
“Wait, how the hell did that get past everyone? Shouldn’t that be a conflict of interest?” I asked.
“It is, but considering his brother doesn’t share his last name, no one thought to dig deeper amidst the chaos and investigations going on,” Raymond said. “My team dug that up, however, and we will use that along with many other things. That said, you have about an hour for this visit, completely unsupervised or taped, but don’t abuse the opportunity.”
“I won’t,” I told him. “And I know it’s your job, but…thanks. I doubt you had to arrange this much.”
“It’s my pleasure,” he said, turning to leave the room.
It was a few minutes later that the door opened again, and I saw Cade enter. There were dark circles under his eyes, deeper than usual, and although his clothes were neat and pressed, he looked around awkwardly as he entered. When he spotted me as I rose from the chair, his face lit up. I didn’t waste time; I kissed him immediately, reaching up to hold the face of the man I thought I would never have the chance to see like this again.
“You look like shit,” I said and then blinked. “Sorry, I don’t know where that even came from. You don’t look like shit, you just look like you haven’t slept. You don’t need me giving you hell when I know you’ve been going through it.”
“Me? I’m not the one in jail,” he said, leaning back to look me over and frowning. “Why do yanotlook like shit?”
“The arresting agent has been doing his best to drive me crazy. Sadly for him, I’m not bothered by any of his petty shit, and I’ve used it as a chance to keep getting under his skin. Apparently driving people who deserve it up a wall gives me life, because I sure as hell haven’t been sleeping much,” I said,dragging him over to the table so we could sit close, facing each other. “I’m told that I have you to thank for Raymond.”
“Sort of,” he said, ducking his head. “Mr. Shepherd was a great help. I guess he knew him back in his Corps days. I think he felt bad that there wasn’t much he could do for us, but I thought that was enough.”
“And…the others?” I said, wincing. “The families? Really?”
“Me and my mama made the calls. She knew some of the families and talked to ’em sometimes. I know you’re probably wonderin’ how much convincin’ it took, but…it didn’t. Hell, most of ’em barely let us get out what was goin’ on before they started askin’ what they could do,” Cade said with a chuckle.
“All that money for a man who didn’t even have the decency to speak to them after their boys died,” I said, hanging my head. “I don’t deserve this. They don’t need to spend all this money on me.”
“All this money? Hell, Ray might be a hardass, but he’s goin’ easy on us,” Cade said, and when I gave him a curious look, he shrugged. “Maybe it’s ’cause all of us were soldiers, you, me, and the guys I mean. Maybe he’s doin’ it ’cause Mr. Shepherd was the one who got ahold of him on my behalf. Or maybe he just don’t like how things were bein’ handled. I dunno, but we’re gettin’ quite the discount. Not dirt cheap, but I saw what his fees normally are and, well…we’re lucky he’s got a good heart.”
A good heart to go with that sharp mind of his. Sheesh, he was bound to be deadly in the courtroom then.
“I still don’t deserve the help,” I said, thinking of their families, of the people I had forgotten about despite spending two years fighting and living with their boys. Only for me to turn around and treat them like they never existed after they’d died. I had never forgotten them though, even as I tried to fight and rally in the name of people like them, of people like me andCade, but it wouldn’t look that way to their families, I was sure of it.
“Help ain’t about deservin’ or not,” Cade said roughly. “Helpin’ is somethin’ ya do when it needs to be done.”
“I’m basically a stranger to them,” I said, looking away. “I was with their sons for two years and then after they died, I didn’t have the decency to call or, fuck, send a card or something.”
“Well, after this, ya can change that. Visit, tell ’em what ya need to, but…I don’t think they’re mad at ya. They know this ain’t easy on anyone, and now I’m thinkin’ they’re probably goin’ diggin’ through the stuff ya were writin’ all this time. I know I have.”
I looked at him. “Really? You’ve been reading it?”
“Should’ve done it before,” he said with a snort. “I mean, I knew all that stuff was a big deal for you, and I knew you were fightin’ in your own way, so I should’ve read some. Especially ’cause I really didn’t know how much it meant ‘til I read some of it. And I, uh…sent them some of it.”
“The families?”
