‘Mainly through making some healthy lifestyle changes, but we would also want to run some tests for related conditions, like diabetes.’
‘Okay, well that doesn’t sound too bad.’ Some of the tension had left her mother’s face at that point, but Bex couldn’t shake off the nagging sense of dread, and she had to ask Eve something.
‘What else could it be if it’s not that?’
‘There are lots of things and I really wouldn’t want to speculate at this stage. It would be far better to wait until?—’
‘Could it be cancer?’ Bex hadn’t been able to stop herself from interrupting and asking the question, but she still hadn’t been sure she wanted the answer.
‘I really don’t want to speculate.’ Eve had repeated herself, but her unwillingness to rule it out told Bex all she needed to know and didn’t want to believe. Her next question had been barely more than a whisper.
‘How soon will you have the answers?’
‘I’m going to arrange the scan and the blood tests straight away, and then one of the consultant hepatologists, who specialise in dealing with issues related to the liver, will analyse the results and discuss next steps in terms of treatment if your mum’s symptoms do turn out to be related to a problem with her liver.’
‘Oh God, Mum.’ Bex hadn’t been able to stop herself from grabbing her mother’s hand, wanting to seek comfort from the one person who had always been able to give it to her, even when it was her mother she was worried about. Donna didn’t let her down.
‘It’s going to be okay, my love. I promise.’ Her mother had clutched her hand just as tightly and Bex had held that promise close to her heart. She was still clinging on to it now, as she and her parents were waiting to be called in to speak to see Dr Isabel Chan, the consultant dealing with her mother’s case.
‘Come in, come in, please and sit down.’ Dr Chan smiled, but it didn’t reach her eyes and the sense of foreboding that seemed to have dogged Bex day and night weighed her down again. It had been six days since she’d taken her mum to A&E, but it felt like half a lifetime ago. She’d gone ahead with the soft opening of the campsite, welcoming some of the reviewers at the start of theirstay, even though she’d felt more like a robot than a person; saying what she was supposed to say, smiling when she was supposed to smile, but not really feeling anything except fear. Thankfully, Tristan had stepped in to ease some of the load. Along with Keira, who lived in the village and went to uni locally, who was helping out in the shop and office when she was needed. Tristan had been liaising with the campers they’d invited to stay, and had dealt with some of the requests for future bookings and press enquiries. Normally, Bex would have been thrilled to hear about the double page spread that was going intoCornish Escapes, a monthly lifestyle magazine, but she’d barely been able to summon up a response, let alone any enthusiasm. They just needed to get through this appointment, that was all. Find out what the treatment was for Donna’s symptoms, and make a plan to focus on that, however it might impact the other parts of their lives. Nothing was more important. Those had been Matt’s words and, when he’d said them, it had been yet more proof that marrying him had been the best decision Bex had ever made.
There was a nurse in the room with them now too, who smiled when Dr Chan introduced her, but Bex only glanced in her direction for a split second. She just wanted to cut to the chase.
‘Donna, are you okay for me to call you that, or do you prefer Mrs Deyes?’ It was almost as if Dr Chan was trying to deliberately prolong the tension.
‘Donna is fine, thank you.’
‘And is this your family?’ Dr Chan looked towards Bex and her stepfather, and it was all she could do not to scream at her to just get on with it.
‘Yes, my husband, Ken, and my daughter, Rebecca, but everyone calls her Bex.’
‘Good to meet you all.’ Dr Chan smiled again. This wasgetting ridiculous now and Bex was balling her fists in her lap. The waiting was agony. ‘So, we’ve had the results of the scan.’
‘Is it cancer?’ Her stepfather’s question had stolen the words out of Bex’s mouth, and she found herself gulping at air instead of speaking. Desperately hoping for Dr Chan to shake her head.
‘I’m afraid the scan does show tumours in the liver and the contrast dye used means we’re able to confirm, even without a biopsy, that it is cancerous.’
‘Oh God, no.’ Bex hadn’t been able to stop the words from coming out, despite her hand flying to her mouth, and Ken was shaking his head too. Her blood felt as if it had turned to ice in her veins. Not Donna, not her mum… She was everyone’s safety net and she was invincible; she couldn’t be the one who was suddenly vulnerable. Bex wanted to say something to reassure her mother that it was all going to be okay, just as Donna had been there for her so many times before, but she just sat there – useless and impotent in the face of her mum’s cancer diagnosis. She couldn’t do anything to take the cancer away, and it turned out she was no help in any other way either. Instead, it was Ken who spoke.
‘That can’t be right.’ His tone was insistent. ‘I looked up the causes of liver cancer and none of them relate to Donna: she’s never had hepatitis and she’s not a big drinker. She doesn’t have a bad diet either.’
‘Sometimes these things are much more random than we’d like them to be.’ Dr Chan frowned. ‘But I want to reassure you that there is some good news.’
It was only when the doctor hesitated that Bex realised her mother was yet to even respond. When she turned to face her, she was surprised to see that Donna didn’t look upset, just completely still, like she was playing a game of musical statues she was determined to win. It was Ken who broke the silence again.
‘What good news can there possibly be?’
‘The tumours are small and contained within the walls of the liver, which means it’s operable and, with a successful operation there may be no need for chemotherapy. All the indications are that it’s a hepatocellular carcinoma, and there are a total of three tumours, all less than three centimetres in diameter.’
‘So you can just cut them out, right?’ Bex was willing the doctor to nod this time, but she sighed instead.
‘If it was a single tumour, or all the tumours were close together, we may be able to do that, because the liver has an amazing capacity for regrowth. However, in your case, Donna…’ Dr Chan was still directing the conversation towards Bex’s mother, even though she was yet to respond. ‘If we want to consider the surgical option, we’d be looking at a liver transplant. I am going to be having a Zoom meeting with the transplant teams from King’s College Hospital in London later today, to discuss it.’
‘But aren’t people on the transplant lists for years?’ Bex wanted the doctors to be able to cut the cancer out more than anything, but every second that passed felt like a second too long, when the cancer could be continuing to grow. ‘I know chemotherapy is often horrendous, but wouldn’t it be better to get that underway to make sure the cancer doesn’t spread any further?’
‘It is an option of course, but as you rightly say it can be a very gruelling treatment and given that your mother has rheumatoid arthritis it presents additional issues. Chemotherapy can cause considerable damage in people with autoimmune diseases like that. It may considerably worsen the symptoms of the rheumatoid arthritis and prevent the periods of remission your mum is currently able to enjoy.’
‘Oh God.’ Bex couldn’t even look in her mother’s direction this time. Donna had always been a force of energy; she’d had tobe, raising her children on her own and always working at least two jobs to keep the family afloat, but somehow still always managing to be there for her girls when they needed her. Most of the time even her diagnosis of rheumatoid arthritis hadn’t slowed her down as much as it probably should have done, but when she’d suffered attacks, the crippling pain it caused had been obvious. Bex had only ever seen her mum cry a handful of times, but she’d witnessed her do so in the midst of a flare up and seen the fear in her mum’s face that this would be the time the rheumatoid arthritis wouldn’t go back into remission.
