I stared at bottles lined up behind the bar. My wolf was quiet for once, suggesting he was listening.
“My wolf is about to stage a revolution, and it’s my fault.”
Axel didn’t gush or squeal or say, “What the fuck?” but waited for me to continue.
“I found my mate.”
He sent me a look and put the glass down. “That's usually good news.”
“It should be, but I rejected it, though not formally. I walked away from the guy, and my wolf is losing it. He won't settle or let me focus, and tonight was the result.”
“You’re talking about Thorne, the new chef.”
“How did you know?”
“Because you've been avoiding the cafeteria for a week, and Angelo mentioned you had a problem with the new guy.” He swiveled around to face me. “As a shifter, I understand a disrupted mating bond. I’ve witnessed some, and it’s heartbreaking for both the alpha and the omega.”
Tell him the rest.
“There's more to it. I had a twin brother, Bodie, who died when we were eighteen.” I rambled on with the details I’d related over the years. It should have gotten easier because I’d related them so many times. “When he died, my wolf lost his other half, and the years since have been dark.”
Axel dipped his head, and I wondered about his history and what loss he’d experienced.
I explained how when I scented Thorne, my wolf reacted as beasts did when their human counterpart met their mate.
“It’s supposed to be their beautiful mystical moment that usually only happens once. But underneath there was another scent that belonged to my dead brother.” I told him how I’d never met Thorne previously and couldn’t explain why he carried the smell I’d longed for since my brother died.
“Are you sure it’s your brother’s scent?”
“I spent eighteen years breathing it in. I'd know it anywhere.”
Axel leaned one elbow on the bar. “Your wolf found his and your mate, and both your brother’s and his wolf’s scent was wafting off the guy. Instead of working it out, you shut it down.”
When he put it like that, it sounded even worse. “What was I supposed to do? Walk up to the guy and ask why he smells like someone who's been dead for seven years?”
“Not in so many words, but your methodisn't working. Tonight proved that. Your wolf is going to keep tearing you apart until you deal with this.”
He was right, of course.
“Deal with it.” He got off the stool.“Get to know him. You don't have to tell him everything right away, and you definitely don't have to lead with him being your fated mate. He's human. He probably has no idea what he's feeling, if he's feeling anything at all.”
“What if the Bodie connection is something I can't handle?”
“You'll find that out and then proceed to deal with it. But you'll find out by talking to the guy, not by avoiding the cafeteria and playing the worst hockey of your career.” He put a hand on my shoulder. “You didn't come to this team to sit on the bench, Raff.”
He was halfway to the door when he looked back. “What position did your brother play?”
The question caught me by surprise, and I couldn’t figure out why that was important. “Left wing.”
Axel nodded. “Get some sleep. Practice is going to be rough tomorrow.”
I sat there with the dregs of my beer and my wolf who wanted to speak but was doing the whole angel passed thing.
You know he's right,he said finally.
Was knowing it and doing it the same thing? In my experience, they never were.
But my wolf was calmer than he'd been in days, and for the first time since we’d met in the cafeteria, the pull toward Thorne didn't feel like a punishment. It was a direction, and I hoped it would lead me where I wanted to go.
