CHAPTER TWENTY-TWO
MILLY
Before the children woke on Easter morning, Milly got up to put the finishing touches on the Easter Glory Cake she’d made using Swans Down cake mix. She frosted it, sprinkled the cake with shredded coconut, and arranged the jelly beans on top. She’d already assembled the Easter baskets with Pez dispensers, a Milky Way each, some Dubble Bubble gum, and an assortment of Brach’s Easter candies. She was going overboard, and all that candy was going to turn the children into sugar monsters, but she had to make up for Lloyd’s absence, as well as her mounting guilt over Wes, any way she could.
She laid out the clothes that her stepmother had sent for the children— a turquoise ruffle dress and matching bonnet for Debbie; shorts, a button-down shirt, and blazer for Jack. She’d never really bonded with her stepmother: Milly had been too old to appreciate anyone new stepping into her mother’s shoes, and she’d stepped into them way too soon after her mother’s death for Milly’s liking. But she’d dress her children in the clothes sent to them because that was the right thing to do. Besides, they’d be adorable—Jack with his knee-high socks and Debbie with her grown-up Mary Janes—but Milly still hadn’t decided if they’d actually go to church that morning. She was sick of making up lies for Lloyd and she couldn’t think of a single plausible reason forhis absence. When the children woke up, however, racing down the stairs chanting “Easter Bunny have some honey” and told Milly how they couldn’t wait to meet him at the Easter egg hunt, scheduled to take place outside the church immediately following the service, the decision had been made for her.
They arrived, intentionally, as the service had just begun. It would be better to be a few minutes late to avoid all the small talk prior, but when they walked through the double doors and an elderly usher talked in a loud whisper advising them on where to sit, almost the entire congregation turned to see who was making the commotion. She caught eyes with Sylvia sitting in the front row, who waved Milly over, but she wasn’t going to parade her kids to the front of the church like that. They squeezed into a pew in the very back.
Milly barely heard a word of the sermon; instead she questioned how Lloyd could stay away from his children for this long. What kind of man doesn’t show up for his children on Easter? It was unfathomable. Was this her life now? Would he ever come back to them? And then she found herself wondering if she even wanted him to.
When it was over, the children lined up on the grass outside, and the Easter Bunny, in his purple overalls and pink ears, made his way down the line, greeting them one by one. And then they were off; the hunt had begun.
“Hello, darling,” Sylvia said. “I saw you sneak in the back like you were in trouble for your sins or something.”
“In trouble? For what?” she said, thinking of just how much trouble she was in. She began ruminating about exactlyhowshe had sinned—and how she’d like to sin again in a multitude of ways—but then she looked out at the children running frantically around the field searching for eggs and felt a painful stab of guilt. Yes, Lloyd might be running around with Beverly Douglas, and he didn’t seem to feel any shame, but Milly was different. She’d never so much as looked at another man. How was she going to live with herself after what she’d done? How was she ever going to pull her family back together after this?
“I’m only joking. Don’t take things so seriously,” Sylvia said, watching Milly and linking her arm through hers as she walked her to a coffee-and-cake table situated by the front entrance. “Just the three of you today?” Sylvia asked quietly, keeping her eyes straight ahead.
Milly cleared her throat, running through all the possible, ridiculous excuses she’d conjured up while they sat through the service. But this was Sylvia she was talking to; she wasn’t going to believe any of that nonsense. “Yes, just the three of us,” she said, resigned. And then, whether it was the guilt of what she’d done, or the desperate need to unleash some of her inner turmoil, she added, “Lloyd hasn’t been home all week, and, quite honestly, I don’t know when he’ll show his face.”
Sylvia patted her arm, which surprised and comforted Milly. Sylvia wasn’t shocked by the confession. She clearly already knew something was awry, but she wasn’t going to judge her.
“Well,” Sylvia said, “I would invite you to lunch with us, but we haven’t even unpacked the kitchen yet, and I don’t know if we can fit more than the three of us around the dining room table in our new place.” She laughed. “That’s if Judith graces us with her presence. She’s so furious at us for moving.”
Milly knew this must be hurting her. “I know a little about unpacking,” Milly said. “I can swing by this week to help you, if you’d like.”
“You’re a doll,” Sylvia said.
At the Bathing Beauty Contest, Milly had noticed that some of Sylvia’s friends were a little standoffish, and she wondered if it was due to Sylvia’s move from her extravagant house on the bay to the little cottage next to Adele. It seemed a paltry reason for them to keep their distance. My God, she thought, if they couldn’t stand by their longtime friend when she was moving out of her home with her husband and daughter, what would they think of Milly if they found out that she was likely getting a divorce, that Lloyd would probably be leaving her for a famous television star, and that she’d just slept with a younger man? She almost laughed at the mess she’d made of her life.
“Why don’t you jump in on a lesson with me and Adele this week totake your mind off things?” Milly suggested. “Moving can be so stressful, and Adele says I need to find women who can actually play if I ever want to learn how to play a match.”
“Sure thing,” Sylvia said. “That would be nice. I could use the distraction.”
That afternoon, instead of baking a ham with pineapple sauce, her cheesy potato casserole, and a peach custard pie, Milly decided to make a picnic and take the children out for an adventure instead. They took the ferry back to the Fun Zone, where it felt desolate compared with the previous day’s chaos. The Ferris wheel was still closed, but they rode the bumper cars and played in the arcade. As the children ran from one arcade game to another, using the pennies she’d given them, Milly sat on a bench and relived her last encounter with Wes.
During the madness of the Bathing Beauty Contest, she’d looked for Wes, expecting to find him ogling the beautiful young women in swimsuits. Instead, she’d found him hitting the high-striker strongman game with his brother, and he’d rushed over as soon as their eyes met, smiling when he saw the children.
“Well, I didn’t realize I’d get to see two croquet superstars at the Fun Zone today.”
Jack and Debbie had beamed at him. “We can beat you now, Mr. Wes,” Jack said. “We’ve been practicing. Right, Debbie?”
“That’s right,” Debbie said. “We would like a rematch.”
“Oh, I am afraid, very, very afraid, because I haven’t practiced at all since we last played,” Wes said, then he reached into his pocket and pulled out some change. “Have you two been on the carousel yet?”
“Yes. But not today,” Debbie said.
“I heard that the horses are feeling very lonely. Everyone’s been giving all their attention to the girls gallivanting in swimsuits instead of those beauties.” He handed them each a nickel, then looked up to Milly. “Is it all right if they ride the ponies?”
“Of course,” she said, smiling at the easy way he had with them.
“The pink horse is the fastest,” he whispered to Debbie before she ran off holding Jack’s hand.
“Thank you,” Milly said, “That was sweet of you.”
“I was hoping I’d see you here,” he said. “We’re leaving early tomorrow morning.” A look of disappointment came over him.
