I exhale. This is it. This is the day everything changes.
The day I willnotregret decades later.
I remove all my clothes, unable to hide my satisfaction with the new body—which delights Xi, I can tell. And then lie back on the cold table, looking straight up at that cage. “Will it hurt?”
“No, Finn. It’s not going to hurt.” Then a worker is next to me, sticking a tube into the back of my hand. “Only a monster would augment a man while he’s conscious. You’ll be asleep. You won’t even know it’s happening. And when you wake up, we’ll talk…”
But that’s the last thing I hear, because my world fades to black.
32 - TYSE
Myra is staring at me. Her blue eyes are very serious. “Do you wanna hear the end of the story now, Tyse?”
I look around, find myself sittin’ on the floor of the Sweep deployment train. One quick glance out the window, where there’s nothin’ but the sandy sea, gives me an idea of where we’re at and where we’re goin’.
“Yeah,” I say, glancin’ back at Myra. “I’m gonna need that endin’.”
“All right.” She rubs her hands together as her gaze tracks along the line of new recruits sitting on either side of me. Then she leans closer, her voice low. “The Corrupted God…”
We all strain to hear. Listening as she recounts the myth.
But it’s hard to follow. She’s talkin’ too low. Whispering, almost. Or maybe the train is too loud.
Because all I hear, on repeat, is the phrase…If you’re lookin’ North, you’re lookin’ South.
And I know what she means, because I’ve heard it all before.
What I don’t know is how it’s done. How do you walk north and end up in the south?
“It’s a loop, Tyse.” It’s another faint whisper, but this is not Myra’s voice. It’s the god. The Corrupted One. Epsilon. Because I was walking the wrong way—and he got me.
I turned my back and he got me.
Put me in a cage.
“It’s a loop, you see.” This time his voice is louder. Clear. “Negative feedback. Prime example, the pyre beetle, native to the extreme northern Alpha Desert. It’s a marvelous example of the phenomenon. You see, when threatened, this beetle activates a chemical reaction inside its body. Mixing two volatile compounds together that, once exposed to the air outside its body, explode like a missile. Killing predators. Alpha insists he thought this one up and created the code for it, but he’s always been a liar.”
Beetles. I have no fuckin’ idea what he’s talkin’ about.
“The negative feedback loop, Tyse. You see, the beetle makes these chemicals inside its body. Specialized glands, or something. But it’s got limits. It can’t fast fire these missiles. It needs to recover. It needs time to make more. The negative feedback loop happens when it empties the chambers containing the chemicals. Because this is an exothermic reaction. Creating intense heat that could kill the beetle. And what good is a biological weapons system that kills the host? Right? The whole process triggers a cool-down period to save the beetle’s life. This is how it works between you and Clara.”
I know this. I said as much to Clara before we ended up here. I take her spark. Feed off it. Which depletes her. Then I steal spark to feed her back. I can’t steal spark for myself, only give it away. I must take from her. I must kill her and bring her back.
It’s a bitch of a fuckin’ cycle if you ask me.
“She claims to have a reservoir of spark inside her,” Epsilon continues.
“What?” Finally managing to speak, my voice is very groggy and hoarse.
“She’s making spark, even after I drain her and give it to you.”
This is not true. I saw her. After the fights, after the monks, I saw her on the table. She was gray. She wasdead. I’m the one feeding her spark. I’m the one keeping her alive.
“That’s what she told me, anyway,” Epsilon says. “Is it true? Did you feed her… jumps? That’s what she called them. Jumps. She claims that’s how you stole the baby god from Tau City and brought her to Delta.”
My mind is not clear. It’s not workin’ well at the moment. And all I keep thinkin’ is that she should not be tellin’ him these things. And I should not answer him. Not now, not ever.
“Nothing to say to that?”
