“You didn’t interrupt anything!” I fling my bag over my shoulder. “We were just practicing. It was great. Tonight, I mean. It’ll be great. You’ll be great, Donovan.” I nod eagerly.
May thunder strike now!
I tuck my hair behind my ears a good ten times, digging a bigger and bigger hole with each dumbass distraction technique I try. Why can’t I just relax, goddamn it?
My gaze drifts back to the table and the puddle of milk beneath it.Great. I must have knocked over the glass when we…Fuck!
Adam’s eyes dart back and forth between us. “Still wanna hit up the mall?”
My heart is hammering hard. Whatever I do, I can’t look Donovan’s way just yet.The mall! How could I forget?Of course he’s going to the mall. That was the plan. And nothing we did here changes that. That was a practice run, that’s all. We went off script, but I was fully in control the whole time.Well, almost the whole time. Almost fully in control, some part of the time.
I’m shaking, I realize. My entire body is trembling, and my mind is racing, so I say the first thing I can think of.
“Don’t forget, dude—no ties.”
“Yeah, I got it.” Donovan sounds so distant.
“Okay!” I say brightly. “Time for me to hit the road.”
I nod goodbye before sprinting for the exit.
By the time I slam the door shut behind me, my head is spinning. I trip down the stairs to the next floor and crouch in the stairwell, holding back a scream.Come on, Carrie. Get a hold of yourself.
Iknewkissing him was a bad idea. I fuckingknewit. The first time we slept together, I didn’t even think about it. It was just for fun—I didn’t need to kiss him for that. I meant it when I said kissing makes sex too intimate. But little by little, I’ve felt a growing pull to have his fucking perfect mouth on mine. It’s also why I wanted him to move on, to find some sweet girl who’s actually right for him. I knew exactly what might happen if I let things get complicated.I knew I would enjoy that kiss way too much for my own good.
The only thing keeping me sane is knowing he doesn’t see me as an option. We’re just… weird friends who don’t share anything more than a slightly deranged project. He teases, I throw jabs, end of story.
Part of me genuinely hopes things with Cheyenne work out for him tonight. That way, I can put a little distance between us. I can put an end to all these uncomfortable feelings. But my evil twin—the one who prefers to forget why I’m so determined to stay single for a few more years—keeps whispering thoughts that make my chest ache. I can’t help it—I picture their date, and it twists my stomach. Worse, I picture myself barging in and stopping them. Irefuseto feel this. I promised myself I wouldn’t, and I repeat it every time my mom crashes and burns.
There’s only one thing for it, I realize. I need to go find Lois at the Java Bar and drown out evil Carrie. The one I thought I’d buried until now.
18DONOVAN
So—we going, or what?”
Adam grabs a pile of towels and starts mopping up the milk. All I can think about is running after Carrie, grabbing her by the elbow, leading her back into the moment we were enjoying when my friend walked in. My lips are on fire. My head is spinning.That kiss was insane.Trust me, I’ve had a lot of tongues in my mouth. This one tasted different.
“Don?”
I jerk my head up. “Yessir?”
Adam laughs. He’s not stupid—he knows something happened and that I’m playing it all back in my mind. And yeah, it’s the uncut version.
“Mall.” He waves a hand in front of my face. “Still wanna go? Do you still wanna go on your date?”
I hesitate.
What should I do? I feel lost. If Carrie had thrown me a bone before she left, shot me a look, given me a sign—anykind of sign—I would already be on the phone to Cheyenne, gearing myself up to cancel. I could’ve taken Carrie on the date instead. But she didn’t say anything. All she did was turn around and practically trip over herselfto get out, like being caught against me was the most embarrassing thing ever. I’m a little pissed, honestly. I hate how she just ditched me like that. She left me to handle all these feelings alone.I spilled milk for her, for Christ’s sake!
“You’re finally starting to get it, huh?” Adam swings the trash can shut. “You guys sure are slow…”
“?‘You guys’, meaning…?”
“You and Lane.”
I frown. “This is nothing like Lois and Lane, dude. Me and Carrie, we’re just friends.”
“Just friends?” He snickers.
