“Plus, she hardly looked at me the next morning. It definitely won’t be happening again. Amy and I have the same vibe—you can tell she isn’t the kind of girl who wants to waste time on boyfriend shit.”
“If you say so.”
“Iknowso. I spent two days with her, and I still don’t know anything about her. I ask her a question, either she ignores me or she answers with something totally random.” I shrug. “Hey, maybe the training will help her loosen up a little.”
Adam smiles. “Makes a nice change from the ones who just won’t shut up, right? Amelia was pretty mysterious at the start, too. I just took it easy, and little by little, she started opening up.”
“It’s insane—you guys are still new, but it feels so right.”
Having spent this whole week with Adam, I’m starting to realize that I underestimated how much he cares about Amelia, and I’m pretty sure this will be the last Christmas they spend apart. They’re both going all in on this one, and it feels really weird to see your childhood friend falling in love, becoming someone new. Hesayshe hasn’t changed, but I’d disagree. He’s acting so lovey-dovey, it only strengthens my resolve to stay single.
“I have to try so hard not to come across as a weirdo,” he’s saying now.
“I think you need to try harder, buddy. This week with you has definitely got me worried about you. It almost made me miss the Wolinskis.” I snicker. “I mean, those two are weird as hell—but you and Amelia?” I shake my head. “Disgrace, dude! And it’s gonna be even worse once you’ve actually slept together.”
I have no idea how they’re managing to hold off. I spent the whole week replaying my night at the motel with Amy.
“There’s more to life than sex,” Adam says.
“Oh, sure there is! Like bird-watching, right?” I sneak him a look. “I still can’t get over walking in on you guys and hearing you doing this random bird call. And it’s a bird I’ve never heard, man. I’m telling you. Like, ever. A fucking bird. Care to explain?” I snort.
I let out an exhausted sigh. He can’t see how hard I’m smiling as I erupt into little animal cries, and he just cranks up the stereo in response.
Halfway through our drive, I end up falling asleep, and I dream of Firebird, naked and squawking on my tree house roof.
“WHAT THE HELL?”
As we walk through the door, the first thing I notice are all the cheesy decorations, but that’s not what’s stopped me in my tracks. It looks like life as I knew it is over—somehow, I’ve ended up trapped in some shitty Christmas rom-com starring all my best friends, while I just have some walk-on part.
There around the coffee table are Don, Carrie, Lane, and Lois—cozied up, sipping on hot chocolate, laughing together as they chat. I blink. The mugs are decorated with candy canes, for Christ’s sake. All that’s missing is a little Mariah Carey blaring in the background.
“Who are you, and what did you do with my friends?” I pause. “Okay, wait—more importantly, who the fuck is responsible for the glittery tablecloth?”
“Me and Carrie!” Don raises a mug to toast me. “We had this whole place to ourselves the past two days, remember? She thought it’d be cute to add a few festive touches for tonight.”
I shoot her a look. “I didn’t know you did glitter.”
“I have a very feminine soul, you know, Lewis,” Carrie says sweetly, blowing on her hot chocolate.
“Incorrect. Everybody knows you have no soul.”
“Damn. That’s me busted.” She smirks at me, and I suppress a shiver.
“Seriously, guys. This is supposed to be, like, our collective man cave.”
“You want a hot chocolate, sweetie?”
I flinch. “Don’t you dare try and corrupt me!”
“But we have mini marshmallows!” she squeals.
“I tried to hold strong, buddy.” Lane shakes his head. “I lasted ten minutes.”
“Laney, you were a lost cause the minute you agreed to that ugly-ass purple footstool that appeared in the middle of your living room.”
“I’d be down for something hot… It’s freezing out there.” Adam pats my shoulder before glancing around the room. “How come Amelia isn’t with you guys, Don?”
“She had lunch with our dad. She’ll be here soon.”
