“Why’s that funny?”
“Because Dad was El Mago, you know? A magician when it came to anything to do with cars.” I smile. “He drove like a dream. He could drive anything; he could fix anything—source any part you can imagine. He could sniff out problems just by listening to an engine. Other racers didn’t even hate him—that’s how much they admired him.”
I breathe in sharply.I miss him so fucking much.
“Mom always thought he’d die behind the wheel, and in a way, she was right. The sad part is, he just ran out to grab us dinner and got hit by a guy driving the wrong way up a one-way street.” I shake my head. “Can you believe it? After all the dangerous-as-fuck situations he put himself in…”
“I’m so sorry, Amy.”
I’ve never told anyone any of this before. My friends back in New York already knew all about it. I suddenly really want to curl up in Lewis’s arms, but I’m too scared to move.
“How old were you?” he asks softly.
“Ten. Don’t get me wrong, we didn’t exactly have the dream childhood—my dad wasn’t perfect, but he loved Mom and Raven and me. We were happy, despite what Mom seems to think since she remarried.”
“So, your stepdad is an asshole?”
“The biggest. Narrow-minded. Obsessed with what people think of him, you know?” I sigh. “When Charlotte and my sister fell in love, he lost his shit.”
I could say more, but I decide to dial it back.
“My dad was no angel,” I continue, “but he would never have disowned his own daughter for something like that. Ever.”
“Sounds like he was a great guy.”
I burst out laughing. “You would’ve hated him!”
“Why?”
“Well, you thinkI’ma rebel… My dad was ten times worse.”
“Sometimes it’s nice to bend the rules a little…”
I peer at him. “You sure you didn’t get hit on the head tonight?”
He shoots me a strange smile, and a shiver ripples over me. I turn back to stare at the ceiling. As I ease into the moment, Lewis fires off questions about life with my dad, and the words just come streaming out of me—all those hours we spent changing engines side by side, buying cars, selling cars, watching him race. Opening up like this is new to me, and it’s not how things usually play out with me and Lewis. To my surprise, I’m finding I actually enjoy it.
I fall silent. I can’t untangle the feelings sparking inside me now, but it’s something like a combination of nerves and contentment and nostalgia for my dad, all rolled into one.
“Amy?”
I turn to look at him, and in that split second, I can tell he knows exactly how I’m feeling. I lose all sense of control when I’m around him, everything I keep under wraps floats to the surface.
“Dr. Conley has a free slot, if you’re interested.”
“Right now?”
He wrestles the cover off and straddles me.
“What’s wrong?” He smiles. “Too tired for round two?”
“Pipe down, big man. You’d always lose a one-on-one against me.”
“That’s fighting talk, but for now”—he eases my spoon out of my hand and peels off my T-shirt—“just let me handle this.”
He still has that weird look in his eyes as his gaze drifts down from my face to my breasts and stomach, and just as he leans in to kiss me, I find the courage to finally admit what I’ve been struggling to acknowledge for a while now.
I’m in love.
