“Oh, trust me—I’ve done more than enough of that.”
I roll my eyes, grab my tools, and duck under the car.
“Remember that song you used to listen to over and over, back when you were fourteen?”
“Nope,” I say.
“Yeah, you do—quit acting like you’ve forgotten everything.”
I watch his feet as he paces around the car. A few seconds later, guitar fills the air. I wasn’t acting like anything—I reallyhadforgotten the song, but all it takes is the opening bars, and the memories come flooding back. Me and him, hanging out in his room. Him the bad boy, me on tenterhooks, waiting for a sign—the green light to throw my arms around his neck.Being a teenager is the worst.Something stirs in my chest. It feels like those days were forever ago.
He rolls down and along the floor, until we’re lying there side by side. He turns to look at me.
“You remember,” he murmurs.
I shut my eyes. All these hours we’ve spent working on these cars the past few weeks… It’s like I’m right back there, in that different place, some other time. Who am I kidding? I don’t hate Esteban—I’m just scared of what he stands for, and maybe it’s because Lewis has let me down, but I suddenly feel so tired of denying the closeness I know we had for all those years. This is a bad, bad idea—him lying there snug against me, his face an inch away from mine. A bump of the past. A hit from another time. Everything I swore I would never go back to.
“It’s good to see you again,” he whispers.
I can’t say it back, though I feel the same. I wish he were somewhere far, far away. The truth is that while Esteban belongs to the past, he’s no stranger. And that’s exactly why I was so upset to see him wash up here. I don’t want him anymore, but that doesn’t take away from the fact that once upon a time, he mattered to me. He was my friend when my dad died. He was my boyfriend when Raven got kicked out. He was always there for me.Always.
I can’t help but wonder how things would’ve worked out if I’d stayed in New York, and I guess it’s written all over my face, because he leans in for a kiss. I turn my face away.Stop, Amy. Stop this.Esteban is the same as he ever was—but I’m growing into someone new. Everything I left behind me needs to stay back there in Brooklyn, and that includes him. I’ve tried too hard to let him draw me back now.
I focus on the part I’m changing. The quicker I get this done, the sooner I can step out for some air.
“Tighten it a little.”
I raise an eyebrow at him and he winks.
“You—”
“Seriously, shut up!”
“Yeah, I remember. No chatting while we work, right?”
I know what you’re thinking—I’m the same old Amy Hitman. But you’re wrong.
As soon as I’m done, I roll myself back out from under the car andscramble to my feet. All I need to do now is change the two front tires, and the Buick is good to go.
I make a start on the screws, when my phone buzzes into life. I crane my neck for a glimpse of my screen and nearly drop my wrench when I see who just messaged.
It only took you another week…
I wipe my hands down on my jeans. It’s Lewis, and that surprises me, because not only have I been low on his radar this past month, a little online stalking earlier today showed me he should be in a game right now.
LEWIS:You free in an hour?
AMY:Don’t you have a game to play?
LEWIS:Yeah, heading back on court now.
My eyebrows shoot up.He messaged mid-game?Relief washes over me. Him going low contact was driving me crazy.He was just way too busy with life stuff, that’s all.
I need to work around that and remember that hedoeswant to spend time with me, despite it all—even if it might not feel like enough.
LEWIS:??
Relax, man.
