She lifts her brows. “Be sure that you get what you need before it’s too late.” She lets that sink in before adding, “Now, if you’ll excuse me, I need to disappear before anyone recognizes me and word gets out that I’ve returned to ruin”—she adds with an eye roll—“my family.”
I chuckle as Rebecca slips back into the wall and vanishes from sight. Then I sigh and slump my spine against said wall, staring out into the crowd.
Several women are eyeing me, but I make a big show of scowling and looking away to fend off any unwanted advances. The last thing I need tonight is a witch looking for a hookup or, worse, love.
There’s only one woman who owns my heart, and she’s dancing with another man.
I just want to die.
Or kill someone.
Maybe tonight’s not the night for that.
Blair dances like she’s made of wind, spinning and moving fluidly. Storm’s a great lead, I’ll give him that.
It’s about the only thing I’ll give him.
He doesn’t hold her like she’s something to cherish, though. He holds her like a possession. Of course, he doesn’t know her. Thatcouldchange.
Or it could not.
What would I feel if they married? Would I be all right with that? Wouldn’t I have to be? Wouldn’t there be no other choice?
There’s always a choice.
I could make one tonight that will change my future, that will change everything. All I have to do is be honest with Blair, admit how I feel.
Tell her that I love her.
Whoa. Hold on there, cowboy.Maybe just tell her that I want to try again and explain what happened, why she thinks that I betrayed her. Explain that I was a teenage asshole who was afraid, but I’m not afraid anymore, and if she wants to walk away from me, she still can.
Once I get that vision.
The alternative is to watch her marry someone else, someone who will never love her like I do, will never love how she pulls her hair to one side of her shoulder, and how she plants one foot on top of the other when she’s thinking, or how she loves puzzling out problems with magic.
The Blair that I remember and love.
Oh gods. I still love her. Why does it hurt to admit that? Why has it taken me this long to really admit it to myself?
Yes, I was halfway there when I decided to attend the ball. It was clearly because I didn’t want Storm Grayson to have her, and I still don’t.
There are things about Storm she should know.
But I don’t want to seem like I’m pushing her away from him.
I glance up when I hear her laugh at something he said, and it feels like someone scooped my heart out with a spoon, let it slide onto the floor and then stomped it with their foot.
I love her. Still. Always have. Always will. I want her to be mine.
Is it worth it to have my heart crushed? Yes, it is.
After all, we haven’t even talked about the kiss—more like we ran screaming from it like it was a building on fire. All I have to do is say I’m not sorry that it happened and that I want more, that I’m ready to be the man that she needs me to be. I’ll explain why I purposefully sabotaged our relationship in high school.
The dance comes to an end, and Blair smiles up at Storm, looking like a star come down to earth, shining for all of us to admire.
She nods at something he said, and then he takes her hand and kisses the back of it like he’s a duke or something. My chest tightens in anger, and I curl my hands into fists.
It’s not until they part ways that my chest finally loosens, the knot unfurling inside my rib cage.
