When it was time for dinner, Colin re-entered and filled a plate. One of the student computers blared early East Coastreturns; they were supposed to be blanked out until polls closed. But this was Sojourn House, which meant one of the students had managed to circumvent the blocks. He retreated back into his apartment, locked the door, and ate because his body needed food. He might as well have dined on sawdust.
Mira’s phone went straight to voice mail; she had warned him she would be unreachable for days, perhaps centuries, if the bad guys won. Only half joking when she said it. Tiana was off doing something important with her family. She had probably tried to tell him what it was, but just then Colin could not remember. He left the house and did another circuit of the main quad, then called Celeste. “I know you’re watching the returns and I don’t want to disturb.”
“That’s the perfect way to describe my current state of mind,” she replied. “Disturbed.”
“Are people always so angry around election time? I can’t remember. Or maybe I just blanked it out.”
“No, this is definitely different.”
“I don’t get it. I mean, Trump—”
“It’s not the man himself. Well, it is. But he’s only one small part of a much bigger picture.”
“I don’t understand.”
There was a long pause. Then, “Hang on a second.”
He heard the background television go quiet. When she returned he said, “If you want to stay watching the returns—”
“They’ll be going on for hours yet. It’s good to step away.” A chair squeaked as she eased her way down. “You remember back a while, you and I talked about something when you were hurting.”
He nodded to the gathering night. “Identity.”
“There you go. I may be seeing society at large through the lens of my adolescent patients. But I don’t think so. You want to hear my take?”
“I love it when you talk with me like this. Like we’re two adults.”
“Because that’s exactly what we are. All right. Here goes, for what it’s worth. I think our nation at large is facing the same identity crisis. Change is striking people fast and hard, coming from all sides. Challenging the way they see themselves and their position within society. Changing the very fabric of their culture. What they see on the news, how the world is becoming too complex to understand, it makes them wonder if they even belong.”
Colin settled on a bench facing across the quad toward the entrance. Headlights flashed through the curved archway, tight glimpses of the world beyond his haven. “They’re angry.”
“Anger and fear and confusion make for a potent mix. It drives people to extremes, both on the left and the right. They look for people with answers.Simpleanswers. Black or white. Friend or enemy.” She went quiet for a time, then, “You still there?”
“Listening. Thinking.”
“People watch these returns, they wait to see whether their candidate won. That’s all they’re after. What they’re not seeing is why the other side is treating them like they’re the enemy. And that is the threat. The real outcome of an identity crisis on a national scale.”
“I’ve heard my father use that word. Enemy. I try to avoid listening. But for the past couple of weeks he’s been everywhere.”
“He’s become Trump’s man around here, no question. But that’s not the point. Well, it may be for you. But not for society at large. You see?”
“He represents them.”
“He expresses their anger. He binds them together on a perilous level.”
Hearing her speak with such clarity finally released himfrom the day’s tension. He realized he was exhausted. So tired he did not know if he could stand. “I’d better go.”
But Celeste did not seem to hear him. “It’s not about this election. Not really. Whether their man wins tonight is not the real issue. I’m not saying it isn’t important, because it is. But even if he loses and Hillary wins, this crisis is not going away. People don’t see that yet. But they will. They’d better. Because if they don’t …”
He listened to the night for a time, then, “What?”
“I’ve said enough. More than, I expect.”
“Tell me.”
“Another time. You go get some rest.” She tried for a brighter tone, and failed. “And good luck tomorrow. I’ll be thinking about you.”
CHAPTER43
