“You have nothing to say, or nothing in your head?”
“Both.”
“Wow. Is that the math nothing or the Zen nothing?”
“It’s the I’m-not-even-going-to-try-and-keep-up-with-you nothing.”
“I suppose we can give that an E for feeble effort.” She bounded to her feet. “Colin, you may walk with me.”
They went off campus the following afternoon, and then again two days later, and the day after that. And the next. Each time they made it a threesome. Colin actually enjoyed the jaunts with Sofia. She was gradually leaving the shadows behind, becoming an effusive girl with a magnetic smile. She and Tiana chattered away, allowing him to float contentedly, like a benevolent patron. He served as driver and let Sofia choose the films and afterward the two ladies argued over food. Their selections were limited to restaurants serving Mexican or Asian Pacific, which Sofia pretended to moan over, and then ate everything.
Finally, when he could stand it no longer, Colin phoned Mira.
He couldn’t take this to Celeste. Why, he had no idea. But Mira was different. He needed to speak with her so badly he felt a leaden ache in his chest when the call went to voice mail. He asked her to call him back as soon as she had a chance. Then he went outside and paced. Around the quad. Again. He phoned once more. This time all he said was, “Please, Mira. Now. Please.”
She called him twenty minutes later. “You can’t complain about me being out of touch. You can’t ask me about … anything.” The last word emerged with a great explosion of breath.
“Mira, remember when you met me at Lenny’s funeral?”
“Of course I remember.” Her voice was flat as pounded tin. “How could I ever forget such a thing.”
“When we walked afterward, I was terrified you’d ask me something. Anything that might force me to let go of everything I was struggling to hold back. But you knew, didn’t you?” He gave that a beat. When she remained silent, he went on, “Remember what you talked to me about?”
“The internal vacuum.” She almost whispered the words. “You losing your mom. Me, my twin.”
“Understanding each other. Being connected in a way that makes no sense. And it helped me, Mira. So much.”
“Is that why you called?”
“No. Well, yes. Sort of.” He took a very hard breath. Expelled it with the words, “I’ve met a girl.”
A silence, then, “What?”
“Her name is Tiana.” Just putting the name out there in the atmosphere shot an electric zing through his heart. “I really, really like her.”
“Does she like you?”
“I don’t … I think so. Maybe. Yes.”
“Well, Colin, this is great. Isn’t it?”
“I guess so.”
“You guess? What is there to guess about?”
“I’m so scared, Mira. I have no idea what to do or even to say around her. We’ve been out, I don’t know, six times, counting our walks. And it’s always been with Sofia.”
“Who?”
“A girl here at Sojourn House. She introduced us.”
Mira actually laughed. “You’ve been taking along a chaperone?”
“Sort of.”
“Colin, honey, why?”
“I told you. I don’t know what to say. How to act. Anything.”
