Margot pointed towards the dressing table. ‘As requested. Think yourself lucky, we don’t usually pull the stops out for things like make-up. Especially the very specific request of bright red lipstick.’
Fitz smiled and went over to the dressing table, opening the drawer where all the make-up was neatly laid out. She ran her fingers across the cosmetics, resting on the lipstick and picking it up. If nothing else, she was looking forward to applying the lipstick. Without it she felt naked. Wearing it made her feel alive. And she would need all the help she could get tonight and tomorrow to succeed with the plan. ‘It’s a good day for red lipstick,’ she declared.
Chapter 19
It had been a long time since Fitz had worn an evening dress and she felt mildly guilty for enjoying the indulgence. She loved flying planes, but she also loved being feminine – fixing her hair nice, wearing dresses, doing her make-up and, of course, her bright red lipstick. For a few hours she would feel like the carefree young woman she’d been before this dreadful war.
‘You look pretty,’ said Yvette, from her position sitting on the bed. She had a bowl of soup resting on her lap. It was nice to see her eating. The potato and vegetable soup would do her the world of good. ‘I like your hair.’
‘Thank you,’ replied Fitz. ‘Would you like me to doyourhair now?’
Earlier that afternoon, Fitz had run a bath for Yvette and washed her hair. She had managed to get rid of the ground-in dirt under the girl’s fingernails. A long soak with a bar of soap and some hot water had transformed the child.
‘Yes, please,’ said Yvette.
Fitz had never felt she had missed out on having a younger sister to play with or to look out for, but sitting on the bed, plaiting Yvette’s now dry hair was almost therapeutic. It was rewarding in a strange way to see Yvette’s appearance transformed. Was it pride Fitz was experiencing? It must be how parents felt about their children.
A wave of sadness washed over Fitz as she had an unexpected memory of her mother doing the same to her hair when she was a child. A rather less welcome memory followed, of Camilla attempting to do Fitz’s hair. She couldn’t quite put a time on it, but she knew she’d been young and Camilla hadn’t been marriedthat long to her father. Camilla had attempted to brush her hair one night and Fitz had made such a fuss, screaming and yelling how it was pulling and hurting. She even swiped the hairbrush away, knocking it out of Camilla’s hand. Camilla had gasped in shock and when she stooped to pick up the brush, Fitz had yelled at her again. She remembered Camilla rushing from the room.
Gosh, why hadn’t Fitz ever remembered that before? She had been utterly beastly to Camilla. Thinking back, she couldn’t recall Camilla ever attempting to do her hair again.
‘Ça va?’ Yvette’s voice broke Fitz’s thoughts and she looked up at Yvette’s reflection in the mirror.
She smiled at her. ‘Yes, I’m fine. I was just remembering my mother brushing my hair like this when I was your age.’ She was too embarrassed to tell her about the Camilla incident. She dropped a kiss on the top of Yvette’s head which now smelt of rose water.
‘Where is yourmamannow?’ asked Yvette.
Fitz hadn’t been expecting that question. How was she supposed to answer that, considering the possibility that Yvette’s mother had been killed?
She couldn’t bring herself to lie to Yvette. ‘Alors,’ she began, running her finger and thumb down each plait. ‘My mother died when I was a young girl.’
‘How old were you?’
‘About your age,’ said Fitz. She watched carefully as Yvette considered this.
‘Is my mummy dead?’
‘Oh, my darling, I don’t know,’ said Fitz, struck by the directness of the question. Had she been so matter-of-fact when her mother had died? If she had, she was sure she’d have wanted an honest answer. Yvette deserved honesty, too. ‘As soon as it issafe, we will look for your mother. I promise I will find out what has happened.’
‘What if she forgets about me?’ The previous matter-of-fact tone had left Yvette’s voice, replaced with genuine fear.
‘She would never do that. You will be in her thoughts every single day. And even though she’s not here right now, her love for you will always be in your heart and in your mind. Exactly like you will always love her. She will always love you. I promise you that.’
Yvette didn’t answer. She pulled her teddy bear to her and Fitz put her arms around her. She hoped her words would offer some sort of comfort to Yvette.
‘Do you still love your mummy?’ asked Yvette.
Fitz hesitated. It wasn’t a sentiment she examined too closely. She preferred to keep those sorts of feelings well and truly locked away, but it was proving almost impossible. How could she offer words of comfort without opening her own heart?
She realised Yvette was looking at her, waiting for an answer. ‘Yes, of course I do,’ she said breezily. She got up from the bed. ‘Now, I should go downstairs otherwise I will be late for dinner.’
‘You are coming back, aren’t you?’
‘Absolutely,’ said Fitz. ‘I promise you that. Now, settle down in bed. You can sleep in with me if you want. And when I get back, I’ll tell you all about the evening, although to be honest, I think it will be very boring.’
She tucked Yvette into the double bed and switched off the light. ‘See you soon,’ she said at the door and blew a kiss. ‘Catch it. Put it under the pillow for later.’
As she stepped out into the hallway, closing the door behind her, Fitz couldn’t help smiling to herself at the warm exchange.
