I dug my hand into my apron and pulled out the oval-shaped cyanide capsule. It was made of glass surrounded with rubber to protect it from accidental breakage. I didn’t want to risk crunching it between my teeth, so I picked up the two dessert spoons and placed the ampoule between them. After a little pressure, the capsule broke and I quickly sprinkled the white powder over the food, mixing it into the gravy that covered the meal. My hand was shaking furiously and even my knees felt jelly-like. There was no going back now.
Just as I was removing the remains of the capsule from between the spoons to slip into my pocket, to my shock, Chanel appeared in the hallway.
I looked up at her. Our eyes locked. I felt the heat of guilt surge up my neck, inflaming it a bright red.
‘What are you doing?’ asked Chanel, her eyes flicking to the trolley, my hands and then back to my face.
‘I … I was just getting your food ready to bring in,’ I stammered. I held on to the handle of the trolley to steady myself as the space around me seemed to move.
Chanel rushed forwards. ‘You stupid girl,’ she hissed.
She grabbed the plate and threw it to the floor. The crockery shattered on the tiles, sending food splattering up my legs, across the floor and up the wall.
I let out a scream. At least I think it was me.
‘Nathalie!’ cried Chanel. ‘You clumsy girl! Look at the mess.’
The next thing I knew, Kranz appeared in the lobby. ‘Whatever is happening?’ He surveyed the carnage before him. ‘Is that my dinner?’
‘I’m sorry,’ I said through a sob that had somehow escaped my throat.
‘Get this cleaned up immediately,’ ordered Chanel.
‘And get some more food ordered,’ added Kranz.
‘No. We will dine out instead,’ said Chanel. ‘I don’t want to wait.’ She turned to me. ‘Get my coat.’
‘Of course, madame,’ I said, scurrying through to the bedroom and returning immediately with her fur coat.
Kranz snatched it from me and held it out for Chanel to slip her arms into. ‘Make sure you clean this up properly,’ he snapped. Then he stopped and stared at the floor. ‘What’s that there?’
To my horror, he was looking at the broken pill capsule. I must have dropped it when Chanel caught me. Before I could think of a reply, Chanel spoke.
‘Oh, that was mine. My doctor gave it to me earlier. I had a headache. Thought I was getting a migraine. I’d just come to fetch it from my bag.’ She gestured to her handbag on the hall table.
‘You never said anything,’ Kranz said. I couldn’t tell if he believed Chanel or not, but at that moment I wanted to hug her and thank her for her quick thinking. I don’t know why she covered for me, but she did.
‘I didn’t want to worry you,’ said Chanel. ‘Now, come on, let’s go. Clean this up and then go home, Nathalie. I will speak to you in the morning.’
‘Oui, madame.’
As they left the apartment, I leaned back against the closed door and slid to the floor. The tears came. Tears of relief. Tears of guilt. Tears of regret.
‘I’m sorry, Edgar,’ I whispered, burying my head in my hands. ‘I’m so sorry.’
Chapter 30
Nathalie
‘Have you heard from Aunt Clarice?’ I asked Maman, trying to sound casual as we sat at the breakfast table the following morning.
‘Not this week,’ replied Maman. ‘The post isn’t very reliable. Why do you ask?’
I couldn’t tell her I was worried about Rachelle and Odile. I didn’t want to alarm her or my aunt; neither did I want to confess to being dragged off and questioned recently. It was a worry my parents could do without.
‘I was just wondering,’ I said, breaking a piece of stale bread from yesterday’s baguette. ‘I miss them, that’s all.’
‘Maybe you would like to go back and stay with them again,’ suggested Maman. ‘It is safer in Brittany.’
