I couldn’t yell at her the way I normally did, not when her shoulder was wet from my tears. But I couldn’t console her either, not when she’d played a role in all our lives ending up this way. “I loved you, and you used me to get to my dad.” My voice cracked but I kept going. “You committed adultery with him, helped him lie to my mom, and now you play warden with me twice a month so he can continue to screw her over, whether she deserves it or not. You say you didn’t want to hurt anyone, but you did. You still are.”
“I know,” she said so softly I barely heard it. “Would you believe me if I said I was sorry?”
I wanted it to be that easy, but all the pieces of me were broken inside and a word wouldn’t put them back together. “Sorry doesn’t change anything.”
“I’m sorry, Jolene.” And then she started to tear up again.
“Is he worth it, really?”
It took her close to a minute, but she reined it in. “No, he’s not. I lost everything I ever cared about because of him, people and time that I’ll never get back.” She looked down at the towel she still held, the one that was smeared with my mascara as well as hers. “Why were you crying?”
“No.” My bluntness made her flinch. “I can’t do that with you. You’re not going to braid my hair while I tell you that Adam’s dad is probably going to move back home soon, or that I lost my friendship with Cherry, or that the Roman Polanski wannabe across the hall isn’t going to write me the letter I need to get into the film program. It’s never going to be the way it was. So stop trying. Please.”
As always, Shelly was spot-on with the takeaway. “Who’s Roman Polanski?”
I slowly closed my eyes and then shot them open again when Guy’s face filled my mind. My stomach launched itself into my throat. “He’s a director who likes teenage girls. Just forget it.” I started to push to my feet, but Shelly caught my hand.
“You mean Guy, don’t you?”
I stilled, and my eyes started to sting, more than sting. “Please, just leave me alone.”
Her gaze flicked back and forth between mine and my eyes filled up faster. “Jo. If something happened, I need you to tell me so I can help you. Hate me again in an hour if you need to but right now...”
The suddenly soft tone of her voice sent a tear rolling down my face. The second it did, I decided to remember—just for a little while—that Shelly used to be my friend.
IN BETWEEN
Jolene:
Can I talk to Adam?
Jeremy:
Hold on.
Jeremy:
It’s Adam.
Jolene:
Was it you?
Jeremy:
Was what me?
Jolene:
Shelly told me somebody beat up Guy. Was it you?
Jeremy:
Yes. I was going to tell you.
Jeremy:
I wasn’t thinking. I should have waited and talked to you. It was right after you told me. I didn’t think.
