Selena: No.
Me: Are you okay?
Selena: I’m fine.
Me: You’re starting to freak me out.
Selena: I’m fine. It’s good news.
Me: You are so full of it. Just tell me.
Selena: I will. Tonight.
Me: I still like my idea of telling me now.
Selena: Don’t be cute.
Me: Since when do you keep secrets from me?
Selena: It’s not a secret. It wasn’t ready until now.
Me: Did you join a cult?
Selena: Yes, Brother Todd is taking me to Vulcan on his magic Pegasus.
Me: That sounds like one of the better cults.
Selena: I comparison-shopped before getting the forehead tattoo.
Me: I need you to tell me because I can’t come tonight.
Selena: Why not?
Me: I just can’t. Can you put it off a night?
Selena: No, I planned for tonight.
Me: Please?
Selena: What is with you?
Me: I met this guy named Brother Todd.
Selena: Now who’s keeping secrets?
Me: I just have to do something tonight. If you want me there for whatever bomb you plan to drop, pick another day.
Selena: I can’t switch.
Me: I can’t tonight.
Selena: @%#!
Me: Do I win?
Selena: &*#@ ^$# @!%!
Me: Thanks, Sel.