“Lady.Edie,” the prince began, at a loss as to what to say. He stood holding the cup of chew sticks, eyes wide. “Please tell me what I can do for you.”
“Tell my people that I am awake, please. But I will see them tomorrow,” I said.
He nodded, an emotional smile offered in return and left.
104. Flags
My husband and I sat in silence for some time. I focused on the satisfaction of eating and drinking and the clean feel in my mouth while I waited for the pain to ebb.
“What happened to Cian?” I asked.
Alric folded his hands across my stomach, letting me slide down his chest a little, my head falling farther back on him for support. “The king ran him through on the sword my brother forged for him. He did not live much longer afterward. Our prince is not pleased. Nor is Jeremanthy or any other general.”
“Why not?”
“Because it is unlikely Cian acted entirely alone. Now we cannot ferret out who else conspired against Tintar.” My husband sighed. “I should care but I do not. There are enough men who do care that I feel I am free to not worry about that.”
“He had such power,” I said. “That wall of rock. He did not even have to bleed first.”
My goddess spoke in my ears,I do not write the rules, girl. The fates do. He gained all of that magic because he claimed it with his soul. He gave his soul for that power. I tried to guide him from this.
Alric nodded. “The wall was astounding. Until you resurrected the stone drakes.”
“Who is archpriest of earth now?”
He waited a moment and replied, “Hazel is acting as provisory archpriestess. Until our king chooses another.”
“He should choose Hazel. She is wise and very gifted with magic.”
Alric made a hmm noise.
Then I asked, “Where is my hand?”
He shifted his weight behind me and I sensed an unease in him. “The king had it— He had it stripped of the flesh.” He stopped speaking so as to compose himself before continuing. “He had it cleaned and it is displayed now, the bones, in his throne room. Along with your sagaris.”
I thought of my ranunculus tattoo on the back of that hand. I thought of the little quill and the large scars from The Gleaming on the palm. “I suppose I am one of his trophies now.”
Alric said nothing.
A abundance of regret grew inside my heart and I began to sob, heaving, ugly, breathless, my eyes awash with tears, my chest struggling to take in air.“I cut off my fucking hand,” I keened when I caught my breath and could speak. “I cut off my hand.”
Behind me his chest shook too and I heard him trying to catch his own breath.
“I— I know,” he said, tears in his voice and then they fell from him, hot and wet in my hair. “I know, wife. My brave, brave wife,” he sighed into my hair, his words shaky. “My Edith.” His arms pulled me as close as he could without hurting me.
I was weak, too weak to even lift my arms and try to return the embrace. We stayed this way, weeping together for some time, my sobs loud, even shrill, animal-like, his tears tempered by his need to catch his breath and kiss the parts of me his mouth could reach, my ears and temples.
“I cannot— I cannot even cut my own meat now,” I said eventually.
“I will cut your meat,” he said, his voice firm.
“I cannot tie my own stays or dress now,” I said. “Or the laces of my boots.”
“I will tie them,” he answered.
“I cannot stand to be a burden,” I started, but he interrupted.
“You never have been a burden to me,” he spoke over me with frustration. “Edith, you are my wife. I will care for you for the rest of my days. Please, stop. Desist in this, please.I cannot standto hear you say you cannot stand to be a burden. You are— I cannot say it. I cannot say what you are to me without— without—” and he began his own unrestrained sobs, burying his face in my hair. His breathing became a shuddering.
