The comments are worse.
This is literally a romcom.
He carried her like she was a princess.
I’ve seen enough. Marry him.
Someone find them. I need the full story.
Why can’t this happen to me?
He is fit!
Cowboy romcom? I’m in!
I open my mouth to speak but I don’t know what to say.
‘Well, you might be speechless, but I’m not,’ JJ says.
‘I’m speechless because I’m going viral for falling into a fountain,’ I protest.
‘You didn’t go viral for falling in the fountain, you went viral for falling in love,’ she replies. ‘Well, sort of.’
‘Yeah, it’s not at all what it looks like – can you, I don’t know, do some agenting, set the record straight?’ I ask.
‘The internet only cares about what it looks like, not what it is,’ she corrects me. ‘But I’ll do some agenting alright, don’t worry about that.’
Oh, God, there’s a look in her eye. The kind I don’t usually like.
‘Whit,’ she says, voice suddenly very businesslike. ‘Don’t look at me like that. Listen to me. This is good.’
I laugh, a little hysterical.
‘This is humiliating,’ I insist. ‘Oh my God, do you think Andy has seen this?’
‘Forget about Andy for a second, think about you,’ she replies. ‘Publishers are going to gobble this up.’
‘Huh?’
‘Your book,’ she says, low-key annoyed I don’t seem to be getting it. ‘You are trying to sell a romantic comedy. And the universe just handed you the greatest marketing hook of all time.’
‘My marketing hook is being accidentally engaged?’ I check.
‘Almost,’ she replies. ‘Your marketing hook is living out a scene from a romcom. People will want to read your voice. They’ll want your story. They’ll want you – the girl who got a cowboy to propose to her.’
‘I don’t even know his name,’ I point out.
JJ waves a hand. ‘Minor obstacle,’ she replies. ‘We’ll make one up. It will get you the meetings, the deal and then, you know, you break up, blah blah blah, so sad, but more material for the next book.’
‘I don’t know if you’re a genius or psychopath,’ I reply.
‘I’m both,’ she replies. ‘And I’m very effective.’
‘Are you sure about this?’ I check. ‘Because the people who know me are going to see this and wonder why I don’t have an actual fiancé. I’m just lucky my family aren’t chronically online like us. They probably won’t see it, but what about Andy? Cordelia? I’m going to look pathetic.’
‘We can style it out as marketing or something,’ she insists. ‘Look, get dressed, we’ll grab breakfast, and we’ll talk about it. Just, hear me out? I’m saying all of this as your agent and your friend. You want a book deal, and I’m telling you that you need an in – the universe handed you one.’
‘Okay, I’ll hear you out over breakfast, but…’
