I notice Biscuits, hitched to the fence.
‘She’s coming with us,’ he tells me. ‘It’s a little ways away – still in the grounds, we’re not going too far.’
‘I’d go anywhere with you two,’ I say with a smile.
He looks like a dream, leaning against the fence like he’s in an advert for aftershave. Hat low, sleeves rolled up, that easy posture of his. Even Biscuits looks like she’s been washed and brushed for the occasion.
‘Thought the break might do you good,’ he tells me.
‘From my life?’ I check. ‘Absolutely.’
‘And I made sandwiches,’ he says.
I blink.
‘You made sandwiches?’
‘Yeah.’
‘What kind?’
‘Ham. Cheese. A lil’ chutney,’ he says.
‘My absolute favourite,’ I reply.
‘And I’ve got potato chips, cake – even did you a flask of tea,’ he adds.
‘Well, what are we waiting for? Let’s go,’ I reply.
‘Come on. I found a spot.’
He helps me up onto Biscuits. I sit behind him, wrapping my arms around his waist, and then we set off.
We take a narrow path that curves away from the main house and the noise of all the visitors. The further we get, the more the sounds fade until all I can hear is birdsong and Biscuits’ hooves crunching gently on the ground.
‘You doin’ okay today?’ Jake asks.
I love the way he checks in, like he really cares.
I hesitate for a second – am I okay? I feel like I’ve been on a rollercoaster and it has temporarily rearranged my atoms. I feel like I don’t know who I am, what I want or what’s going to happen.
‘Ahh, I’m fine,’ I say breezily. ‘I’m living my best life. Engaged to a cowboy. About to be a bridesmaid in a powder-blue dress. Totally fine.’
‘You sound like you’re spirallin’,’ he says.
‘I am not spiralling,’ I insist.
He gives me a look.
‘I’m just gently twirling,’ I correct him. ‘I’m sure things will settle soon, when life goes back to normal.’
We trot another few steps. The path dips slightly, the trees thinning, letting the sun back in.
Ahead is a meadow. Not a manicured estate lawn-meadow. A real one. Long grass and wildflowers and that soft, unbothered feel of a place nobody’s tried to curate for the public.
Beyond it, tucked behind a line of trees, is a narrow stream, glinting in the sun. The water runs clear and quick over little stones, and the sound of it is instantly calming. I don’t even want to leave.
‘Oh wow,’ I blurt.
