Seven years ago
Johnny and I sat on the water tower, our feet dangling as the sun fell over the town.
"So, where to next?" He asked me. He offered me a can of beer we'd stolen from his grandpa's garage. We clanked them together in a toast and popped the tabs, taking sips of our first beers together.
"I'm not entirely sure. Far, far away from New Jersey." I laughed. "I heard about this town that has a Frankenstein festival every year around the author's birthday. I think that could be fun. I'll make it in time if I hitchhike."
"So worldly," he teased. "What's this town?"
"Shelley Vale." I patted the map in my back pocket. "And after that, I'm not sure. I'd like to see as much of the country as possible."
We sat and listened to Johnny's radio, drinking our gross beer.
"You ever think you'll go back? To your family?"
I shook my head and looked out at the trees down below. "Not by choice. Too many bad memories. I doubt they even miss me."
I'd thought about it during my stay with Johnny and his grandma. We were only an hour or so away from the park, and yet, I saw no flyers, no news reports, nothing to indicate they were concerned.
"I'm going to miss you." Johnny reached for my hand, bringing it to his lips. "You're the first one past my grandma who saw me for who I am."
I smiled. "Why wouldn't I? You're beautiful the way you are."
Tears welled up in his eyes, and he quickly brushed them away. "So are you, Domino. Never let anyone change that. I hate that you're leaving, but I can't wait to see what good you give to the world."
"I'll send you tons of pictures." I lifted my camera and took a quick photo of him. "Although I might keep that one for myself."
"I can't wait to see your journey on film. Are you sure you don't want to take any photos with you?"
I shook my head. "Nah. It'll just weigh me down. I'll come back for them eventually."
"Even this one?" Johnny turned and pulled a photo from his backpack, handing it to me. I took it and my breath caught. It was the last photo I took before I climbed the fence and left the park. Dennis Swayze and Koi Maitland.
"I knew there was a reason you took that photo!" he accused. "Domino, you have crushes on these boys!"
I blushed and gave him the photo back. "Maybe. But it doesn't matter. I'll never see them again, and even if I did, they'd never be interested in someone like me."
Limpy, whitey, ugly stepsister, the other Risky, nobody, loser, hideous beast.
The names Marisol, Mattias, and all their friends had given me echoed in my head. They'd been beaten into me until I believed them as true.
"What are you talking about? Babes, you're so pretty, and your kind heart makes you downright radiant. They'd be stupid to not ask you out the moment they saw you."
I shoved his shoulder with mine, but despite my hang-ups, I smiled. He always knew exactly what to say.
"Fine, I'll keep this photo, but just know, you can tell people all you want that you don't like anyone, boy or girl, but I'll always know your secret." He waved the photo before putting it back in his bag.
"Keep it, and I'll keep all of yours."
"See, that's why I love you." He side-hugged me.
I realized at that moment that this was the first time I'd heard those words since my dad died.
My smile faded. I took my beer to my lips again and leaned against the rail, resting my cheek on the cold metal. "Sometimes I think the world would be better without me in it. I'm no one, Johnny."
"What? Don't you dare!" he exclaimed. "You're so important to me, and you're gonna be important to so many other people. I just know it. Your heart is too big not to."
I said nothing, but continued to stare ahead, watching the sun lower.
