“Yeah,but there’s no real good schools around here. Especially blood-friendly.” I cocked an eyebrow at the panicked man beside me. What was his problem? “This has always been the plan.” I reminded him.
“School,yeah, but not you moving. I thought you liked living together.”
“I do. This isn’t some slight on you. If you’re that upset about it,come with me. Worst case scenario, you can find a place close by if I end up staying on campus.”
“Why would you stay on campus if I had an apartment near the school?” he demanded.
I blinked.“Well, now it’s because you’re acting like some— I don’t even know. I don’t like this.” I waved my arms around wildly. “Whatever this is.”
He gritted his teeth and gripped the wheel tight again. “It just makes me more comfortable to have you close to me. To know you’re safe.”
I laughed. “Do you think I can’t handle myself? I’ve spent the last thirty years on my own as a vampire. I don’t need saving. I live with you because Ilikeyou, not because Ineedyou. Get that shit out of your head now.”
“Why are we even fighting about this?” He threw up his hands. “You haven’t even gotten into a school. This is dumb.”
“Because it will happen, eventually.”
“Will it?” He shot back,and his shitty remark had me speechless. I opened and closed my mouth. Then, I turned my head to look out into the dark.
Fuck you.
“Scout, I’m sorry. That was a shitty thing for me to say. I’m just—”
“Nah, you don’t get to take that back. I don’t know what’s going on with you, but you better figure it out before we get back home. Otherwise,I’ll move out before I even start applying to places.” I didn’t bother to look at him as I said it.
I closed my eyes and pressed my forehead against the cold window. I was naturally cold, but it still felt good on my skin.
“I don’t want to fight. I love you,” Desi whispered when there was a slight delay between songs. His words stung,and I felt them in my stomach. I took a deep breath and sat up. I grabbed my bag and pulled out the bottles. We were about halfway to New Jersey.
I unscrewed one and offered it to him. He took it with a soft murmur of thanks. I drank from my own bottle and reached for his phone. He was right. I loved him too, and I hated fighting with him. I went through his music and switched to my music.
I turned the volume up and sang along with all the female-led bands that filled the playlist. Maria Maria was the first to play, and I saw Desi roll his eyes when Cleo De La Rosa’s voice came through. He was not a fan ofpunk-pop. Eventually, the tension in the car disappeared,and we were back to joking and singing along to The Cranberries on our way to visit two of the Seven Sins.
Boredom eventually began to set in,and I pulled out my tarot cards. Desi had gifted me my set after my side had fully healed from the Sunshine. He had surprised me with the cards and offered to teach me how to read and understand them.
I opened the deck and set them down on my sketchpad. Desi glanced at my lap.
“Doing a spread?” He grinned. He loved it when I took an interest in the cards. Besides cinnamon candy and horror movies, Tarot was one of his favorite things.
I shrugged and let out a small yawn. “Yeah, I guess. I haven’t played with them in a while. I didn’t bring any of my books,though.” I frowned. Desi chuckled and tapped his temple.
“I’m your reference book. Do your spread,and I’ll fill in any gaps.”
“Do you want me to tell you the question?” I looked up at him. He shot me a look that I wasn’t sure how to interpret.
“Only if you want me to know.” Again, I could hear the rest of his words, unspoken.
Why wouldn’t you want me to know?
Something in my stomach made me hold back from telling him. I swallowed and closed my eyes, letting myself thinkaboutthe question. As I thought, one hand drifted to the dip in my neck, where his name sat. It suddenly felt warm against my otherwise chilly skin, but it was a comforting warmth.
What will lead me to true happiness?
That had always been the goal. For so long, my curse made me run toward a finish line I’d never cross. I begged for real answers and thoughtthat breaking my curse would reveal everything, but it hadn’t. I still had questions, and I still felt sad. Why?
I squeezed the necklace, then dropped it quickly to draw athree-card spread. It was my go-to, as I hadn’t memorized any other ones yet. Past, present, future.
Queen of Cups, Three of Pentacles, The Moon.
