I could almost feel the steam coming from both men’s skin.
“Tate, stop,” I sighed and glanced around the table. “We’re not like, trying trying. He’s just…”
“Purposely trying to piss me off? Consider it a success,” Ronny said before hopping off his stool and storming off. Silence fell across our table as we watched him go. He stormed out of the club, the doors slamming behind him in a sharp screech. I turned to Tate and glared.
“Was that really necessary? Why did you do that?”
“He deserved it.”
“No, he didn’t.”
I hopped off my own stool and excused myself. I went backstage to the dressing room. It was getting close to opening time anyways. I started unpacking my bag and taking off my day clothes. The door opened as I was slipping on the fishnet tights. I rolled my eyes as Tate came in and closed the door softly.
“Look, I’m sorry. It just slipped out.”
“No, not all of that macho ‘she’s my wife’ bullshit.” I rolled my eyes. “You did it on purpose. He’s been trying to be cool and adjust to seeing us like this and you had to throw that in his face.”
I stood up from the couch and grabbed my shorts to put them on. I slipped the blue sweater over my black cami and reached for my black Bobby socks.
“Well, he would have had to deal with the reality of it eventually. Hell, you could be pregnant now and we wouldn’t know it.”
“I’m not pregnant,” I said, although not as confident as I should have been. Even though I had birth control, there was always that low nervousness in my belly that came with a semi late period. It had only been a few days. There was nothing to worry about.
“What do you want me to do? Apologize? I don’t know why you are so protective over his feelings. He didn’t care about yours or mine when you two were together. Why should you give a shit?”
“Because I still care about him!” I shouted. The silence that came after my statement was tense. I sighed and crossed my arms. “Not like I care about you. But like Cash and Dallas. You guys are my family, and I don’t like seeing him hurt. If we are going to make this work, you can’t keep saying things like that to him. If you want him to know something, let me do it.”
“Fine. Whatever. Are we okay?”
“No, Tate. I’m not okay until I know he’s okay. You don’t know him like I do. I’m going to go find him.” I pulled my boots on and didn’t bother with lacing them. I stood up and stormed out of the room to go do so.
I found him outside by his van, smoking a cigarette. I approached him slowly and he looked up with curiosity. His face revealed no trace of anger or pain.
“What’s up? I saw they’re letting people in,” he tilted his head towards the front of the building. I nodded and crossed my arms over my chest.
“Are you okay? I told Tate he was wrong for that.”
“For what? Laying it all out? I mean, he’s not wrong. I just… I don’t think I’m ready for that.” he laughed. “I know that sounds absolutely absurd considering it doesn’t involve me in the slightest. It’s just weird for me. When you and I were together I kind of thought that maybe that would be us.”
I raised my eyebrows in surprise.
“You thought we’d have kids?”
“Not anytime soon, but maybe. That might be my unmedicated mind thinking, sure, but it did cross my mind. You didn’t think of us like that?”
I felt guilty in answering but decided this was the time to be honest.
“No.”
He blinked rapidly and I could see the hurt in his face.
“I’m sorry Ronny. It never was a thought for me because it wasn’t right. You and I.”
“You didn’t seem to think that before he came into our lives,” he snarled. I could see that my honesty had hit something inside him. His eyes were glossy. His jaw tight.
“No. I always thought that, although I didn’t want to admit it. I loved you, yes, but not for the right reasons. I loved you because you wanted me despite having someone wonderful at home. It was exciting and kind of a bragging right to have you choose me over her if I’m telling the truth. But past that, I never considered us getting married, having kids, and growing old together.”
“But you do with him,” he accused. I chose to ignore the harshness in his tone. I nodded.
