CHAPTER 16
Marcus had spent all afternoon thinking about Lucy and her ride. When he should have been working, his thoughts were awash with images of her on horseback, the wind blowing through her red hair, laughter on her lips, and a smile in her eyes.
Such an image made his chest tighten, just as it made his limbs tingle in ways that he was not used to.
I am merely happy for her, is all. And pleased with myself. It costs so little to do the right thing, and that is a lesson I ought to remember.
When the sun finally started its slow descent beneath the horizon, Marcus decided that he would seek Lucy out and ask how her ride had gone. Just to confirm that it was as he had hoped… just to confirm that she was happy.
He knew that she would be in the nursery, as she often spent time with James before supping. However, when he poked his head in the door, he found only Helga and Margaret were there.
“Your Grace…” Helga stood beside Margaret, who breastfed James. “Is something the matter?”
“Have you seen Her Grace?” Marcus asked. “I thought she might be with you.”
“We have not seen her all day, Your Grace,” Helga said. “Certainly not since she left.”
“Since she left…” It was subtle, but a coldness seeped through Marcus’ skin as he considered the possibility that…no, that is unlikely. Impossible even. She is probably just downstairs, in the library or what have you.
He hurried down the hallway and toward the library.
Lucy was not in the library, nor was she in the dining room, or her own room for the matter. Panic started to descend upon Marcus, the niggling sense that something was wrong.
He refused to consider such a thing and figured that the easiest way to dismiss such a notion was to check what time Lucy had returned. She’d left the house nearly six hours ago, meaning that she had likely returned sometime in the past two hours. And with Marcus having been at work all day, it was no wonder he did not hear her come back.
In the stable, rushing to where Beauty was kept, Marcus saw now that nor the horse or his wife had come back. And when he asked the stable hand, this was confirmed.
“I’ve been expecting her for some time now, Your Grace,” the stable hand said. “Thought she might have gotten lost.”
“Lost…” Anger boiled inside of him. “You thought… no, you did not think! Look outside, man! See the time! Lost or no, she should have returned by now!”
“I am sure she will soon, Your Grace.”
Marcus held onto his anger because it was the only way he could possibly fight back the rising panic that threatened to take him. The sun was now set, night had come, and his wife had not returned. That meant one thing and one thing only…
“My horse!” he snarled at the poor stable hand. “Ready it at once.”
“But Your Grace –”
“At once!”
One minute later and Marcus had his horse running at full pelt down the empty London street, headed north, hopefully in the direction where Lucy might be.
As he rode, his mind whirled with infinite possibilities, all aiming to explain where she was. Maybe she was just lost? Maybe she was simply taking her time? Maybe she had decided to ride to her father’s estate…
They were excuses, Marcus knew. Hope and dreams, but not reality. And as he pushed his mount harder, caring not for how dark and dangerous it was, he conceded the very likely reality that his wife had fallen from her horse, was lying in a ditch somewhere on the side of the road or in a field, and that he might never find her…worse still, that I might be too late.
Marcus was not used to feeling this way.
That was the advantage of living alone, caring for himself only. When he was all which mattered, he did not have to worry about feelings or emotions felt for another. His life was his only concern, and that just made things easier.
The death of his friend James had changed that. His adopting of the baby, James, had confirmed it. And now with Lucy in his life, Marcus was forced to reckon with a world of which he was not the center. It was, without a doubt, the worst thing he had ever felt before.
He reached the end of the road in record time. It soon turned to dirt and then forked in several directions. One way led east, through farmland. The other west, across green fields and open pastures. Marcus reared his horse up, cursed to himself, and looked both ways while trying to decide what direction to ride in.
“Where did you go…” he muttered to himself.
In the end, he chose to ride east, and for reasons that made no real sense to him. It was just that hefeltas if it was right, that his wife might have gone that way. He could not explain it, he could not reason with it, but he sensed that this was the correct choice.
