Oh yes, what a fun conversation that was…
He could still picture clearly the look of abject surprise and horror on her face when he told her of the child. And while she had agreed that she would help raise it, for what other choice did she have, it was not something she looked pleased about.
Would she make a good mother? Would she even try? As in all things, time would tell.
“I know what you said you told her,” she corrected. “I know what she has been told to expect, regarding the child. But what I do not know, nor do you for that matter, is what she expects from this marriage. She is not a nanny. She is not a governess. She is to be your wife, and like it or not, that means something.”
“As I explained already to both you and her,” Marcus felt his jaw tighten, “this is to be a marriage of convenience only. Yes, she is to help where James is concerned – that is her chief role. Outside of that, I want nothing from her. As she wants nothing from me.”
“That is all well and good,” Honoria agreed. “But will you think on what that means? Once you two marry, it will be expected that the two of you act as man and wife.”
Marcus leaned back. “If you are suggesting that she and I… I will not force her into bed with me. I do not want such a thing.”
And that was the truth. Marcus had been honest with Lady Whitcombe when he told her what was expected, just as he was honest with himself when he thought on what he expected too.
Despite Lady Whitcombe’s beauty, Marcus did not envision a world where the two of them grew into this marriage. He did not foresee love blooming between them. In his eyes, marriage was not about love and romance. It was a business, as had been the way with his parents. A colder relationship did not exist than that which he had witnessed as a child, and he wanted nothing of the sort.
Better to pretend that they were not married… to do as promised and leave it at that.
Honoria rolled her eyes. “What the two of you do in this home is your business. My meaning is, there will be times when both of you are expected to be seen in public.” She cocked her eyebrow at him. “And how will it look if you can hardly stand to be around one another? If you are little better than strangers?”
“I…” Marcus hesitated. “I did not consider that…”
“This might be a marriage of convenience, but it needs to be companionable also. Otherwise, people will talk, and such a thing as that will not reflect well on you. Or James, for that matter.”
Marcus winced as the truth of this statement settled upon his shoulders. And a most heavy truth it was.
With how quickly this had all happened, he had not considered the long-term effects of this marriage. So concerned was Marcus about James that he did not imagine this marriage beyond the child’s care and well-being.
Honoria is right. If we are to make this work, to fool the ton, we will need to at the very least get along. Whatever that might look like. If such a thing is even possible.
“You are right,” he groaned and rubbed his eyes. “I… I did not think of that.”
“Which is why you have me.”
“I will speak to Lady Whitcombe,” he concluded. “I will explain to her that…” He laughed bitterly. “That she must try not to hate me.”
“Not as easy to do as you might imagine.”
Marcus was in over his head, and he knew it. It was one thing to force this marriage so that James would have someone to care for him. But it was another entirely to consider the larger implications, the very real fact that Lady Whitcombe was going to be in his life from this day until his last.
And all the while, that initial image of her climbing from the carriage battered at his subconscious for reasons he refused to consider.
“Is there anything else?” he asked.
“One more thing…” Honoria turned and looked down the hallway. There, a doorway stood open, and inside the soft cries of the baby could be heard. “How long has it been since you’ve seen him?”
Marcus winced. “Not that long.”
“Meaning?”
His stomach seized with sudden guilt.
Marcus wanted to do right by the baby. That was how he had gotten into this mess in the first place! However, it had become painfully clear to him recently that he knew as much about child rearing as he did about… about sprouting wings and using them to fly.
Worse still, he was beginning to suspect that the baby hated him. Whenever he tried to help, whenever he held him or was near, the baby burst into tears as if the mere sight of Marcus terrified him to his core.
How was he to do right by the child, and by his friend, if he could not even be in the same room? How could he do any of this? What was he thinking?
“James is being looked after.” He strode past his sister and, as he came closer to the doorway, he dared a quick glance inside.There, a maid sat, James rested on her lap, perfectly at ease and happier without him.
“He needs more than a mother!” Honoria called. “He needs a father too!”
“One problem at a time!”
So much had changed in Marcus’ life of late, and still, those changes continued to pile up. Today, he would visit London and begin the process of procuring a marriage license. In two weeks, he hoped, he would wed Lady Whitcombe once and for all. After that, he would be married, his life would never be the same. And then…
If only I knew. If only I could guess. As hard as things have been lately, they are only set to become harder. I am marrying Lady Whitcombe to make things easier on me, but I sense the opposite will be true.
And all the while, he could not scrub that initial image of his future wife from his mind…
