“I’d like to stay,” he finally admitted, and my heart began to pound.
“Then why don’t you?”
He stood up abruptly and rolled his shoulders. He ran a hand over the back of his neck. “I just… It doesn’t matter.”
He leaned against the railing and watched the sun settle over the fields without saying anything else.
“Tex”—I set my glass down—“please tell me.”
He hesitated and turned to face me. “Rowan, I don’t know what it is about you, but when I’m around you I can’t think straight.”
The words hit me like a shock.
He exhaled sharply, like once they started, he couldn’t stop them.
“And it’s crazy,” he continued. “I don’t do this. I’ve never felt like this before. Not with anyone.”
My heart pounded so hard it hurt.
“You make me want things I’ve never wanted before,” he went on quietly. “When I’m with you, you make me think about things I ain’t never thought about before. Like things could be possible.”
Emotions swirled in my chest and tightened my throat.
“But there’s no future here,” he added, shaking his head slightly. “You deserve better than a man like me. And I wish I was selfish so I could just say fuck it and take what I want, but when I think about you I know you deserve more, and I want more for you.”
“Tex,” I began, watching him as he paced back and forth
He gave a soft, humorless laugh. “It’s how I know I love you, Rowan Hale.”
He froze, like he hadn’t meant to say it out loud, and shock flickered across his sun-worn features.
“Hell…” he muttered, shaking his head. “I don’t know why I said that. I didn’t mean. I don’t know what I’m saying.”
“I love you too, Tex.”
The words slipped out before I could stop them, and he stopped pacing and looked at me in stunned silence.
“I don’t know how it could work,” I admitted, my voice soft but certain. “I don’t know what a future would look like for us, but I want it. Because I can’t imagine my life without you.”
My heart was racing.
Tex looked at me, his soulful brown eyes swallowing me whole, and I knew that I meant it. I loved him and I wanted him. I wanted a future with him. I wasn’t sure how it would work, or even if it could, but I knew I owed it to myself to at least try.
“Do you mean that?” he asked, and I nodded. “Rowan, I don’t know what kind of life I can give you, but I can promise you I’ll always be faithful. I’ll always be yours, at least until you don’t want me anymore.”
I stood up, setting my glass on the table, and I reached up, placing my hands on each side of his face so he would hold my gaze. “I want you, like I’ve never wanted any man before. Now will you kiss me?”
His gaze dropped to my mouth and back up. “If I kiss you, Rowan, it’s not gonna be casual.”
I felt my brows pull together. “What are you saying?”
“You’re it for me.” His eyes searched mine, something unreadable moving through them. Like he was trying to figure me out.
The world seemed to stop and neither of us moved.
“You’re it for me too,” I said, feeling almost shy as the words slipped out.
And then he kissed me.
