I’d intended to call it quits between us, letting him know that things couldn’t and wouldn’t go any further, yet I hadn’t yet been able to say those words to him. And even if I did manage to say them, they would be a lie.
I turned and headed inside, wondering what the hell I was doing. Everything was wrong with the situation. Letting him put his hands on me, letting his lips steal my breath, and letting him into my life. I was with someone else, and Battle and that thing between us could never go anywhere.We could never be anything but that: a man and woman stealing kisses when we thought no one was looking.
*
I felt his eyes on me no matter where I was or what either of us were doing—playing with Bonny, putting groceries away, or dusting. Battle’s lust-filled gaze followed me. I became accustomed to it—to the feel of his heated stare on my ass as I walked, to his eyes tracing the curve of my jaw. I felt it all, and I stopped being embarrassed, stopped blushing, and just let it be what it was.
I pretended, for that short while, that it was our home, and Bonny was our little girl. That Battle was my husband, fixing my porch and kitchen cupboards while I cooked and cleaned. I faked our life, and what it should have been like, but what it most likely would never be. But I didn’t feel sad. I felt strangely at peace with it all. I accepted that that was it for us, despite wanting more.
Bonny was playing in her playpen with some soft toys and I had just made myself a drink of iced tea from the minimal supplies Gracie had in her pantry, when Battle came into the room, his huge body filling the space and his overbearing presence stealing the air from the room.
“Got any more of that?” he asked, jerking his chin toward my glass.
“Yeah, sure,” I replied, and started to the kitchen.
I had to pass him to get there, but when I reached him he didn’t move. Instead he reached around me, his hand sliding down my back and flattening my body against his. I automatically wrapped my hands around his waist as he reached down and took the glass from my hand.
“Don’t spill it,” I mumbled as the drink sloshed in the glass.
He smirked and raised the glass to his lips before downing the entire thing in three mouthfuls. He placed the glass on the cabinet next to us and wrapped his arms around me again.
“Battle—” I started.
“Q,” he interrupted, “don’t overthink this shit.”
“But—”
“Just let it be—this moment, this feelin’. Just let it be.”
I sighed, wishing it were that simple but knowing it was anything but.
He leaned down, pressing his forehead against mine again. “I’m gonna steal you, Q. Don’t care what it takes. You’re meant to be with me. I know that like I know how to breathe, and there ain’t no one gonna tell me it’s wrong.”
I tilted my face up and his breath washed over my face. His hands moved up and down my back and I whimpered, feeling like Jell-O in his hands, my body molding to his touch.
“Tell me you don’t want this too and I’ll walk away,” he rumbled out quietly, his mouth moving down my throat. “Tell me you don’t feel this thing between us and I’ll let you go.” His hands moved up my waist, up over my shoulders and to my throat, where he gently tipped my head back further so he could look in my eyes, and I whimpered as his eyes burned into mine. “It’s the craziest shit, Q. Ain’t never felt nothin’ like this before. Never wanted anything as much as I want you, and maybe that makes me a pussy, but I don’t care. I’m gonna lay it out for you and then we’re gonna kiss, okay?”
“Okay,” I breathed.
“Ain’t even been inside of you yet but I already know it’s more than that. That this sweet body of yours is just the fuckin’ icing on the cake. Because what I feel between us goes deeper than that. Don’t know how—it just does. Can’t explain it, because it’s unexplainable. But I know that one taste of you isn’t enough, just like I know that a hundred tastes of you won’t be enough, and I know you feel that too. I’ve done a lot of shit in my time, shit that made me feel alive, my body full of electricity, wild and free, but ain’t nothing made me feel more alive than when my hands are on you and your mouth is on mine.”
I nodded, my heart beating wildly in my chest, panic and excitement coursing through my entire body at that huge beast of a man pouring his soul out to me.
“That’s how it is, and I ain’t gonna apologize or make excuses for this shit. I know that you’re supposed to be Ripped’s, but you’re not anymore. You hear me? You’re mine now. Body, mind, and soul.”
I stared at him open-mouthed, wide-eyed, and my heart surging in my chest.
“You hearing me, Q?”
I nodded because I didn’t trust myself to speak right then, and he chuckled.
“Gonna kiss you now, okay?”
I nodded again, closing my eyes.
Battle placed his lips on mine and I got lost in him. In the feel of him—his hands, his lips, his erection, which was pressing against my stomach. I got lost in the moment of me and Battle, together, like we belonged.
~ 14 ~.
