I sighed, because clearly Nancy wasn’t there, but there was no way of leaving without speaking to her mom either. I didn’t have time for that bullshit, but I had to play the game regardless—otherwise I had a feeling I’d be leaving there with nothing but an earful of motherly lectures.
I stomped up the rickety steps, my heavy black boots echoing loudly. The steps creaked and I was almost certain my foot would end up going through one of them if I stood on them too long. Fucking place was falling apart. Inside was even worse. The door squeaked loudly as I pushed it open, almost falling off, and the smell of stale smoke and mildew hung in the air. Nancy’s mom was sitting down on a small brown corner seat, a lit cigarette dangling between her fingers.
There was no mistaking the resemblance between the two women, but where Nancy was beautiful and vibrant, her mother looked tired and worn out. I’d been told that Nancy had come back to Miles City because her mom had fallen sick, but this was more than just being sick. Life had killed this woman’s soul.
“Sit down,” she ordered, and surprisingly I found myself automatically doing it. “She’s already gone,” she said. “Thank God, too, because she was driving me nuts hanging around here all the time, nagging constantly,” she sighed. “She’s a good girl, but she’s as defiant as they come. And feisty,” she cackled. “Lord is she feisty! So yes, if you catch up to her, don’t be bringing her back here to me. She needs to get back to the city where she belongs.”
I did a double take. I’d been expecting her to hate me for driving her daughter away, and beg me to bring her back to take care of her.
“Don’t look so shocked. I never asked her to come back here to take care of me. That was her choice. I know what happened to her—I didn’t at the time, of course, but it’s a small town and I heard the rumors. Leaving here was the best thing she ever did. And coming back was the worst thing.” Her cigarette was almost burnt out and she pulled another one from her pack and lit it from the other before stubbing the old one out into an overflowing ashtray.
“Does she know you know?” I asked.
“Does she knowyouknow?” she returned.
I nodded. “Yeah, she told me last night.”
It was her turn to nod then, and a stray lock of graying hair fell across her forehead. She pushed it away and pursed her lips. “No, I never saw the point in telling her I knew. I thought the best thing for her was to put that night and this town behind her. I was never a very good mother, but I loved her and I always wanted the best for her. Leaving here was the best thing for her.”
I grunted in agreement. I didn’t know the Nancy from before that night, but I knew how I felt about the Nancy from after it.
“I’ll be honest with you, son,” she said. “Never liked that Tammy girl though. Always looked down her nose at me, like she thought she was better than me.” She shook her head, her gaze going around us. “Maybe she is.”
“Can’t say I liked her either,” I said, cracking a grin. “And this shit,” I said, gesturing around us with a hand, “it don’t make you the person you are. So fuck Tammy.”
She laughed. “Maybe not you though.”
I chuckled too. “Yeah, maybe not me.”
“She always liked both girls and boys growing up. Mostly had girlfriends until she met that son-of-a-bitch. Never thought she’d end up with a man.” She watched me warily and sighed. “Can’t say I like you much either if I’m honest; you seem like trouble to me. And you need a haircut.”
I nodded. “It’s not the first time I’ve heard that,” I replied without care.
“I bet it’s not.” She laughed again and blew out a plume of smoke. “But I think you’re a good man—deep down, at least. Maybe you don’t know it, but she does. And I trust her judgment.”
I didn’t know what to say to that. It was a backhanded compliment at the very least. And at the most? It meant that Nancy actually gave a shit about me. Enough to talk to her mom about me. I needed to get the fuck out of there and find her.
I stood up and her gaze shot to mine. “He used to come by here sometimes, you know.”
I cocked an eyebrow at her, my confusion giving way to anger that flared to life in my chest as I realized who she was talking about.
“He used to ask about her—what she was up to and how she was.” She shook her head. “We never talked about what he did to her, but I think he knew that I knew. And it was obvious I couldn’t do anything about it.” Her eyes took on another hard edge and her lined face looked more like a hundred than sixty. She looked down at her hands. “I wish I could have done something more for her, but I couldn’t. She was my little girl and I was helpless. All I could do was give her everything I had in my savings and then let her go. His family would have buried us. But I know I was wrong to not fight for her. I know that now.”
I frowned, realizing what she was telling me. I looked around the trailer, seeing how she was living, and realizing why.
“Jesus,” I muttered.
“You do what you can for your kids. You’ll understand one day, I’m sure. Pity he never got what he deserved though.”
I hesitated, taking the unusual step of involving a civilian in club business. Deep down I knew I had to, though. I’d pegged this woman all wrong, and she needed to know that Nancy was safe now.
“He’s dead,” I said. Vin would probably kill me for speaking about it, but I couldn’t imagine how it must have felt for her to know all that time what had happened to her daughter and not be able to do anything about it. She deserved to know, and I had no doubts that she wouldn’t tell a fucking soul. “All of them are dead, as of this morning.”
I wondered if she’d freak out. Or cry. Maybe get angry. But instead a small smile lifted her face.
“That’s good, at least.” She stood up and headed to the fridge. She opened the door and pulled out some yogurt and started to eat it. Not sure what I expected her to say or do, but the blasé response surprised me.
“Where is she?” I asked, more than done with this shit now. I’d given her more information than necessary and it was time to move on and do what I’d gone there to do.
