“What did you just say to me, freak?” he said. And I didn’t like the way he called mefreak. I wasn’t a freak. I was loved. And I told him so.
“I am loved,” I said, and then Cody laughed, and I got angry, and I could hear my dad shouting for me to ‘get my ass back over here,’ but I wouldn’t leave Carrie like that. “I am loved and you are not.”
“Just go,” Carrie said. And her face was soft and so was her voice. And she was sweet and kind and beautiful, and I wanted to protect her.
“I’ll protect you,” I said to her.
She rolled her eyes at me. “It’s just an argument, Ethan. It’s no big deal.”
“He shouted at you.”
“Because she’s a cock-tease, that’s why!” Cody shouted, sneering at Carrie. He looked back at me. “‘I am loved,’” Cody mocked and laughed, and he had a horrible laugh. “Get the fuck outta here before I bust in your face, man.” He turned his back on me, and the world turned red. The trees, the skies, the sidewalk. All red.
I didn’t even try to stop myself when I reached out and hit him in the side of the head with my closed hand. ‘A fist. I made a fist and I hit someone with it,’ I think with shock.
“She doesn’t love you, she loves me,” I said as he held his hand to his head and turned back to look at me. He looked angry. Angry like Carrie’s dad does when he’s drank too much. But I wasn’t scared because I was protecting her. My Carrie.
“I don’t love you,” she said…’and wait, what did she just say?’
I kept my fist closed, ready to hit Cody again if he grabbed her.
“See that, freak? She doesn’t love you. Now I’m going to kick your ass,” Cody sneered. And then he did.
He kicked my ass. And my back. And my head. And my arms and my legs. And Carrie didn’t stop him. She just stood there watching him do it with her arms folded across her chest like she was impatient. But I knew it was really because she was scared. I could hear my mom screaming in the background. But ‘it’s okay,’ I thought. ‘I’m not scared, Mom. Carrie, you should go before he finishes and tries to hurt you too.’
But Carrie didn’t try to go. Not until Cody had had enough of hitting and kicking me. Then she took his hand in hers and they walked away together.
“Stay away,” one of them said.
Who said it? Was it Carrie or was it Cody?
“I’m sorry, I’ll make it up to you,” I said through the blood in my mouth, and then I watched them go down the side of her house. ‘I wonder if they’ll go down the side of her shed like she takes me sometimes, where I touch her and she touches me. I hope not,’I thought as I tried to get up. I wanted her to know that she didn’t need to make it up to me. I’d take any beating for her.
And then my mom was suddenly there, and she was helping me to my feet, and she was taking me inside. And she was crying and yelling at my dad that he should have done something. But he was just standing at the window, looking out of it. I think he was looking for Carrie, to make sure she was okay. And Mom was still screaming and crying, and eventually Dad turned around and his cheeks were flushed and he looked at me, and I hardly recognized him when he said,
“It was the only way he was going to learn to stay away from that little whore.”
‘But I won’t stay away from her,’ I wanted to say. ‘Not ever.’
‘We love each other.
And she’s not a whore.’
