I hear movement at the back of the cottage, and Cristian appears, apparently sneaking in from the side hidden by trees.
The moment he sees me, he stops and just waits. I don’t know what to say. I can’t say goodbye.
“You don’t have to do this,” he finally says. “I know people who could help us disappear.”
“I do. I made a promise.”
He nods. “I should have made you make a promise to me.”
It occurs to me that he made a promise to me.
To protect me.
Again, I’m coming out of this looking worse and worse.
More like Alessandro.
“I’ll go kill Maksim. I don't care if Alessandro executes me for it afterward."
"Don't say that." My voice breaks as I rush to him, touching his face, memorizing every line, every angle. "I couldn't bear it if you died because of me."
"And I can't bear to watch you marry him." His hands tighten on mine. "I'm in love with you, Valentina. Not just lust or infatuation. I love you. And our child."
My breath catches as he places his hand gently on my stomach.
"I would rather die knowing I tried to save you than live knowing I did nothing while he destroyed you piece by piece." He presses his forehead to mine. "Let me protect you. It's all I've ever wanted to do."
I want to say yes. I want to give him hope and love and everything he wants for us.
But I know our world too well to know that he wouldn’t live long, and then I’d be without him in the world.
The guilt I have now would be a million times worse if he died.
"I can't let you do that." I press my palm against his chest, feeling his heartbeat. "I'd rather live in hell knowing you're safe somewhere than spend one moment of happiness that ends with your blood on my hands."
“I’m good at what I do?—”
“I know.” I smile, because I do know. “But you’re not immortal against an army. Two armies. Plus, the risk isn’t just you. It’s the baby. That’s all that matters now, right? Not me. Not you."
“Right.” He glances down at my belly, and I hate the devastation I see in his eyes.
"Please. If you love me, if you love our child, you need to leave New York."
Cristian's jaw clenches. "You're asking me to abandon you both."
"I'm asking you to survive." I cradle his face in my hands. "I'll contact Luca. He's made a life away from all this. He'll help you, give you work."
“I’m sure Alessandro won’t like that.”
I smile. “It will make Luca want to do it all the more. Luca marches to his own drum, you know that. My brother respects loyalty and strength. You have both. He'll understand when I explain."
Cristian turns away, running his hands through his hair in frustration.
I can see the war inside him.
The protector battling the pragmatist.
The man who loves me fighting against the soldier who understands impossible odds.
