She’s still thinking of names for them, but she keeps asking me to go see them in person. I haven’t told her much about Dakota yet. I told her the truth, that I met him through work and we became friends, but as far as the whole dating thing... Yeah, I haven’t broached that subject yet.
It’s not that I’m ashamed about dating a man or that I think she’d care about me dating a man as opposed to a woman. But Shelly and I agreed after our divorce, we’d ease Amber into us dating other people.
That we’d make sure it was serious before we brought it up to her. Randy and she dated for months before he met Amber.
But itfeelsserious with Dakota. I suppose I should at least take him on one real date before I discuss anything about it with Amber. But I know I want to tell her. That I want to tell everyone.
Even my bonehead friend. I shove Jackson playfully, and he stumbles but quickly rallies and easily regains his step. “Not my boyfriend, yet,” I say. “I don’t think. I did ask him out on a real date though.”
“Holy shit, really?” He stops walking and stares at me.
I shake my head at him. “Really.”
“You really do like him huh?” He’s grinning at me, looking pretty surprised. Why? I don’t know. I think it should be obvious. Especially the way I growled when Jackson told Dakota to call him.
I guess he thought I was playing around. But when it comes to Dakota, I don’t think I can play. I’ve never felt this feral about anyone.
“Is that a bad thing?” I ask him, nerves kicking up a little bit. This is all pretty new to me, but no one on Oakley’s Crew has acted like me being interested in a guy is strange.
“No,” he says, walking closer to me to put his hand on my shoulder, gripping it. “I’m happy for you, man. Maybe I didn’t see it coming, but sexuality is fluid.”
I frown. “You think?”
He nods, and for once, Jackson seems totally serious. “Yeah.”
“So what do you think I am?” I ask, feeling a little vulnerable and strange asking him, but Jackson has been unapologetically loud about being bisexual since I met him. I’ll never forget him hitting on me on our first job together. I told him I was married to a woman, and he just laughed and said he had to shoot his shot. Then he asked if my wife was hot and if we ever liked to play around.
I told him yes, she is, and gave him a firm no. Don’t get me wrong, to each their own, but the thought of a threesome is intimidating as hell. I do have a jealous side, after all, and I might be a little possessive.
But Jackson has a certain charm about him. Instead of wanting to punch him in the face, we became fast friends.
“I can’t tell you what your sexuality is, man.” He’s looking at me with a little bit of pity though, and I don’t like that at all. “Have you been attracted to men before?”
I shrug, looking around at all the guys I work with as they bustle around getting ready for the day and then back at Jackson. Definitely not any of these men, though I know they’re all attractive. They’re all like my brothers.
My face must tell my thoughts because Jackson bursts out laughing. “Not them.” I look over at him, slightly embarrassed. “I mean, we’re sexy as fuck.” He’s still laughing, and I glare at him. “But that would be like fucking your brothers.”
I cringe. “You did hit on me when you first got here.”
He has no shame because all he does is shrug. “Yup. You’re hot. Of course I did, but now that Iknowyou, it’s anoh, hell no.”
“I didn’t say I wanted you,” I say, making sure he knows that.
He’s having way too fun with this because he cackles. “You couldn’t handle me.” He winks, and okay, that’s enough of this.
“Good talk.” I head toward my truck.
He turns serious again, and honestly, I don’t think that’s any better. “Hey, wait.” I stop. Why the hell do I stop other than I’m way out of my element here? And okay, I know he has my best interest in mind. People don’t always take Jackson seriously, and I know he’s carefully cultivated that reaction. He doesn’t want people paying too much attention to the real him. “Are you attracted to Dakota? Do you like him? Like,likehim?”
“Wow. Are we in junior high?”
He doesn’t let me get away with joking, just stares at me, waiting for me to answer.
I huff a heavy sigh, thinking about Dakota and his beautiful face. His eyes that seem guarded at first, but once he opens up—just... wow. That little half smile he gives me—one I’ve had to work to see, but boy was it worth it. And it’s not just his beauty... it’s the way he cares about Mavis and her kittens. It’s how he opened up to me about his high school bullies and him telling me how he was afraid he’d stay away from the outside world forever.
How I know he wants to trust the world but is understandably afraid. It’s his adorably, snarky attitude and the way I catch him looking at me when he thinks I’m not paying attention.
“Okay, wow. That answers that.” I startle slightly, kind of having forgotten about Jackson being there but not doing anything but grin at seeing his warm smile, having figured me out. “So do you actually need a label?”
