It’s a doorbell sign; the content isn’t negotiable.
“I have an alternative, wait a second.” He pulls a small silver sign out of his back pocket. Black lettering in a sans serif font, but just one name.
My heart sinks into my stomach. Panic brings tears to my eyes. “You want to move out? Why?” How can he still sit here as if everything is fine?
David decisively pushes me aside, stands up and I immediately miss his warmth. I want to hold him back; this time I won’t let him disappear into thin air so easily. This time I’ll fight, this time... he takes my face in his hands and kisses me. With that gentle tenderness that is so characteristic of him, that is so familiar to me. Okay, that’s good, right?
“Usually you’re not so slow, Lou. What’s wrong?” With these words, he lets go of my cheeks and takes my hands. Slowly, he sinks to one knee, and it dawns on me. One name. My name. For both of us.
“Lou, I don’t want to lay out our whole history here. But we’ve known each other for a damn long time, and whether we were together or not, there hasn’t been a second in all those years that I haven’t loved you. There were times when I hoped it would stop because it hurt so damn much. There were times when I was sure that no matter how much I loved you, I couldn’t. There were times when I hoped you didn’t loveme anymore, just so it wouldn’t hurt so much that I was to blame for all this mess. A scenario like this was unthinkable for us for so long, and yet here we are now.”
I’m crying, tears streaming down my cheeks.
“No, I definitely don’t want to move out of here. I love you more than anything and anyone else. If I had to choose between you and the rest of the world, I would always choose you.” David’s green eyes sparkle and his voice trembles, but he smiles, looks at me, and holds me tight. There is nothing but endless love, no more fear, no question marks, no what-ifs, no uncertainties that have dominated our relationship for so long. We are together, here and now, strong and full of confidence. We know that life isn’t always fair; we’ve had to learn that the hard way over the last few years. But no matter what life has planned for us, we can handle it.
“Ask me already. Or do you enjoy keeping me waiting?”
“A little. But actually, I’m just enjoying the view right now.” David grins sheepishly and brushes a curl off my forehead. “Will you marry me?”
My forehead sinks to his, I need to feel him. I know that our garden has filled with people in the last few minutes, but this moment is just for us, and my answer is only for him, for the man I love more than anything.
“Yes.”
Chapter 54
David
32 years
“You or me?” There’s a loud cry from the extra bed—at two in the morning. For the third time this night.
“I’ll go. You have to get up early tomorrow.” That’s true, but with two newborns, he’s not getting as much restful sleep as he needs either. “And your mother will come by later and take them for a walk. I’ll lie down for a bit then.” With a practiced movement, he places the baby on my chest and gets up to prepare the bottle.
Felias immediately calms down a little. Of course, this doesn’t solve the massive hunger problem that a baby hasevery few hours, but I have the feeling he already knows something is coming soon when he is lying with me or Lou. It works similarly with Levi.
We always knew we wanted children, and our families have always supported us in this wish. After a long search and various agencies, we found a woman in the US who was suitable for us as a surrogate. A woman who was willing to not only carry the child, but also to donate her eggs and maintain contact with the child after birth. We always wanted our child to know where they came from, that they have a biological mother who they can write emails to and visit at some point. We didn’t want a black hole in their biography.
Finding someone who was willing to do all this and who was also a good fit for us in terms of personality was not that easy. But we weren’t stressed about it, and when we met Hailey, we knew she was the one. She already had three children of her own and was done with her family planning, but she wanted to help couples experience this happiness too.
After two failed attempts, it finally worked. We were so happy, and when it became clear that we were having twins, our joy was immense, of course. Fraternal twins from insemination are extremely unlikely, but hey, here we are. Finally at home with our two boys.
I’ll be honest, it’s super exhausting, but also extremely wonderful. Levi is like his father, with dark, thick hair, dark eyes, and very active. Felias is calmer, with fine light blond hair and bright blue eyes. For now. My eyes also turned green over time.
We spent the first month in the US, and Hailey breastfed the little ones. We’ve been home for two weeks now, and who would have thought, my mother has a maternal sideafter all. Louis has taken parental leave, and every morning while I’m at work, she comes over and helps him with the babies. She changes their diapers, feeds them, comforts them, rocks them to sleep, and does it all with so much love and patience that I could cry.
At first, I was worried that she would interfere with everything and know better than everyone else, but Louis is just grateful for her support.
“I’m back. Come on, give him to me.” But I don’t want to give the little bundle back yet. “Leave him with me, I’ll take care of it.” Felias greedily sucks on the bottle, the heartbreaking crying stops immediately and is replaced by contented grunting. Tiny little fingers reach for my hand, and I can’t imagine ever being happier than I am right now.
***
“Where are my two boys?” Both squeal as my mother approaches us beaming. Levi almost jumps out of Louis’s arms, so Felias has to make do with my father, but honestly, the two of them are the better fit anyway. Felias doesn’t need action. When things get wild and loud, he wrinkles his little forehead and pushes out his lower lip. My mother says I was just the same.
Levi is the complete opposite. It’s a shame we can’t ask anyone what Louis was like as a baby. I know my husband misses his mother, even more so now that we are fathers ourselves and he does most of the caregiving because I work full-time, but he’s doing a great job. Adrien sneaks up on my father and Felias. With a quiet “peek-a-boo,” he makes his presence known, and immediately the little one beams from ear to ear. Two little teeth now adorn his smile and make himeven cuter. If that’s possible. Similar to my parents, the boys have their clear favorites with Louis’s fathers. Levi is Philipp’s and Felias is Adrien’s, matching the characters of the grandfathers and the kids.
Today we are celebrating Louis’s birthday in our garden with all our loved ones. It’s quite busy, but everyone gets along and laughs together. I’m not quite sure what Jannis and Luca are up to, but they are whispering frantically to each other, and Luca keeps pointing at Jannis’s hand, who is shaking his head vehemently.
“Lou?” My beloved is standing next to me, watching the hustle and bustle in our garden with me.
