Relief coursed through my whole form, and I curled into him, nuzzling into his hip now, squeezing his thighs in my arms.
“I really, really like you, Aspen. Like, maybe too much.”
He stared down at me for a few moments, considering. I wanted to know what was going on in his brain, but I could only stare back, waiting, hoping I wasn’t freaking him out. I’d always been open about how much I liked him, but… It felt like something had shifted. Like he’d carved open some part of me even I hadn’t known about. And it was all for him.
“It’s not too much,” he said. “I…” He trailed off, and I had to hold back from begging him to keep going. But I knew better, and waited patiently. “I like that… You like me so much. It’s never been this way for me.”
I swallowed hard, nodding. He didn’t know it, but he’d just destroyed me, in a way I hadn’t even known to want or ask for. It felt like I’d crossed a line, one I could never go back over.
“It’s never been this way for me either, Cupcake.”
ASPEN
FOR THE FIRSTtime in what felt like basically ever, my life seemed weirdly… Settled.
My mom was doing well. I’d been checking in with her almost every day, at least through text. Winter break was rapidly approaching, and I’d be spending the whole three weeks with her, something she was very happy about.
In terms of the situation I had going on with Caelyx… I had nothing to complain about. That didn’t stop me from making up complaints here and there, of course. I had to keep him on his toes, just in case. But he was used to me, and didn’t seem to mind when I was in a bad mood. In any case, being around him generally fixed my bad moods. Not that I would have ever admitted that out loud.
We weren’t exactly dating, but we weren’t exactly just hooking up either. It was unlabeled and unrestricted, which felt casual and free but also oddly grounding. I’d never had that with anyone, someone acting as my anchor to center me and keep me from floating away to drown in a sea of my own worries.
It’d been two weeks since that first time he’d spent the night in my dorm, and he’d only become more…Caelyx-likesince then. Was there a word for someone who was annoying, but didn’t actually make me feel annoyed? We texted nonstop, and constantly found excuses to be in each others’ presence, even if it was just to silently study together in the same room for a few hours. He was more clingy and affectionate than ever, something I never thought I’d be into until him. Basicallyeverything about him was something I never thought I’d be into until him.
And it didn’t hurt that he was shamelessly addicted to taking my dick at every possible opportunity. I’d created a slutty, needy bottom monster, but I had absolutely no regrets about that.
Everything important in my life felt calm and settled and placid, like the surface of an empty lake. So when a text from Faulkner Vane came through on my phone, plunging through that still surface to send stress and ripples throughout it, I could only stare and heave out a deep sigh.
He’d given me a street corner to meet him on, and told me to be there in an hour and a half so we could have dinner and a nice talk. A twinge of anxiety curled up in my stomach, because I’d have to lie about where I was if Caelyx asked to see me. And what if he randomly decided to follow me or something? What the fuck would he think if he saw me socializing with his dad, of all people?
I felt relief wash over me as I remembered that for once, Caelyx was scheduled to work a shift at the café when I wasn’t. I’d offered to drive him anyway, but he told me he didn’t mind the walk, so I’d planned on staying in and studying. Apparently, that wasn’t going to happen, but at least Caelyx wouldn’t catch me going behind his back. The barb of guilt, sharp and sticky, panged to life in my guts again and I groaned, flopping down onto my pillow. I wasn’t used to doing things I had to feel guilty for.
And anyway, it wasn’t my fault some overly assertive billionaire was holding a metaphorical gun to my head and forcing me to have dinner with him. Some overly assertive billionaire whose son I happened to be fucking. Frequently, and with great relish.
I sent him back a thumbs up to confirm I’d be there, and set my phone face down on the bed. So much for focusing on the nuanced complexities of business process management.
I FELT LIKEa low rent prostitute waiting at the street corner for Faulkner Vane to pick me up. I didn’t know if blackmail dinners had a dress code, so I’d just worn jeans and a hoodie. It was starting to get pretty cold, but it hadn’t snowed yet.
When a limousine pulled up next to me, one of the back windows rolling down to reveal a smug, handsome face, I had to suppress a grimace.
“Good evening, Aspen,” Faulkner greeted me as a uniformed driver hurried around the car to let me in. I slid into the large open space in the back, eyeing him wryly.
“Very tasteful,” I commented sarcastically, glancing around at the premium leather seating and wet bar situated in the center of the space. “Subtle.”
“And what about me has led you to believe I would value subtlety in any form?” He wondered politely.
He had a point there. He didn’t have a subtle bone in his body, and certainly hadn’t passed any on to Caelyx either.
I didn’t bother answering his rhetorical question, but I listened intently as he yammered on about his day, weaving recent anecdotes about his work into the conversation. Like we were two good buddies just out for a meal together, not two people who barely knew each other, one of whom was there under duress.
We drove about 20 minutes from the tiny town of Byron Bay before the limo came to a stop and we were let out in front of a nice restaurant. I was glad we’d driven a bit, since I definitely didn’t want to be seen by anyone I knew.
Once we were seated and had our drink orders taken, I waited for him to lace his fingers together like a Bond villain and start interrogating me or whatever he planned on doing, but he didn’t. He seemed totally at ease, but I knew he had to have asked me here for something.
“So tell me how things have been going for you,” he requested.
“Shouldn’t you know all that already?” I asked. “Haven’t you been watching me?”
He tilted his head, and gave me that oddly affectionate look again. Something about his expression clicked two puzzle pieces together in my brain. He liked me because I didn’t kiss his ass and treat him like a king, just because he was rich and important. Or at least, if he didn’t like me, he was intrigued by me. Maybe that’s what had intrigued Caelyx about me, too.
