He isn’t joking, so I don’t fight him on it. Besides, he’s right. I should’ve taken that call more seriously.
“I hear you, and if anything like that happens again, I’ll come to you,” I promise him. “But, I’m fine.”
He nods and softens up a little. “I know but… this shit’s so hard to believe. And to top it all off, I get to be the one to tell Sterling about Tiffany, which is fucking perfect.”
I glance around when he mentions Tiffany, only now realizing she’s not on Sterling’s arm tonight.
“Why isn’t she here?”
West leans back, and that look on his face makes it clear the answer to that question is complicated.
“She’s visiting her parents in Sarasota.”
I nod slowly. “And is this visit just because she misses them? Or…”
“Not quite,” he sighs. “Ricky got a tip about her being seen with April at the coffee shop. So, Sterling confronted her, asked if she’s been talking shit about the family. She denied everything, but the conversation went bad anyway.”
I glance toward Sterling, and there’s no missing that he’s hurting right now. Even if he’s trying to hide it behind a thinly veiled smile as he chats with Dusty.
“But now, your talk with April means Tiff lied,” West adds. “She’s a big reason shit’s been getting back to Pandora, and we both know how Sterling is when it comes to loyalty.”
He’s right. Idoknow. Sterling loves hard and therefore expects those he trusts with his heart to be all in, too. And from what April shared, Tiffany crossed a line, and I’m not sure that’s a betrayal Sterling can move past.
West’s words sink in. I’m not a huge fan of Tiffany, but I love Sterling like a brother. Now, he’s likely got a hard road ahead of him.
“But as long as you’re okay, we’ll get through the rest of it,” West promises, then takes both my hands in his.
There’s this moment that sneaks up on me. It makes me forget that things haven’t been so great lately, and it’s like I’ve gone back in time, feeling the butterflies like I’m a teenager again.
There’s hope in West’s eyes, and it’s contagious. I want this to work, and I believe he does, too, but we have to focus. Allthe physical stuff has to stop. We have to get to the root of what’s eating away at our relationship. Because if we don’t, sex will just put a Band-Aid on the gaping wound that’s already festered too long.
Clearing my throat to make things a little less awkward, I pull my hands free, pretending to be interested in the notification that just vibrated my phone. But truthfully, I just need a second to breathe, to not get too lost in him.
“I should um… I should get back to my seat.”
“Or you could stay here. With me,” he adds, and my heart does a somersault inside my chest. “I want as much time with you as I can get.”
His transparency, his willingness to let me see his soul, has me in a chokehold.
But we have to tread lightly. I don’t just want us to work for now, I need us to work forever, and there’s a very fine line between the two.
“I know, but…”
“Don’t make me beg,” he says quietly, smiling in this way that has my chest rising too quickly to control.
“I want to, I just—”
“Stay,” he pleads, and the rawness of his voice makes my throat tighten.
“West, I… I can’t.”
“Blue…”
I don’t meet his gaze again as I slip out of the booth, forcing a shaky smile to hide my emotions. And while there’s nothing I want more than to melt into West and let the rest of the world fall away, I cross the diner in a daze. Because everything in me wants to let what little progress we’ve made be enough, but knowing it would be short-lived stops me.
I saw it with my own eyes, over and over again. My parents repeatedly played thebreakup to make upgame, never getting to the root of their problems. It eventually broke them for good, and I can’t let that be us, so…
Focus on the big picture.
