It’s beyond me why he wouldn’t stand with me on this, but I feel his judgment. Whether he means for me to or not.
I climb into the truck, slamming the door behind me, staring straight out the windshield as he rounds the hood, then gets in beside me. I hate this. We’d just salvaged the night after a near disaster at Coach’s house, only to get tripped up on this.
West starts the engine, but doesn’t speak. And when he places the brochure over the visor, taking care not to lose it, I’m furious.
Too furious to just let this go.
“Would it have killed you to stand with me on this? Would it have killed you to trust that Imightknow my mother better than you do?”
A confused look crosses his face when he turns toward me.
“Blue, I—”
“She doesn’t get this,” I repeat, cutting him off.
He drops back against his seat, staring straight ahead. “All I’m saying is that I’ve worked hard to get where I am, Blue. And if my money can go toward helping a family member, I can’t think of a better way to spend it.”
My head snaps toward him, but it takes a moment to find words because there are so many racing through my mind. Starting with,really asshole?
“Yourmoney?”
I’m breathing so fast I’m dizzy.
West rolls his eyes. “That’s not what I meant.”
“Really? Because it sure as hellsoundslike that’s what you meant. It sounds like, because you’re the breadwinner, you think this decision is yours to make. To hell with the fact that she’smymother.”
He pushes his hands through his hair as he exhales. “What’s mine is yours. It’s always been that way, so don’t take one thing said in the heat of the moment and twist it, Blue. Please. It’s been a long day, and it’s possible I’m not thinking straight. Let’s just… go home. Please,” he says again, starting theengine, maybe thinking that’ll put an end to the conversation, but it doesn’t.
“Since you think you know what’s best, do whatever the hell you want.”
“Never said I know what’s best. But what Iamsaying is that we can speculate all day about whether she’s sincere this time or not, and maybe this is the wrong time to try to teach your mom a lesson.”
His words cut deep. Probably deeper than he realizes.
I’m silent as he pulls away from the curb, easing onto the street without another word. He stares straight ahead and so do I. I replay the conversation, digging deep to see whether I want to take anything back, and I don’t. I stand firm on my decision to stay out of this situation, but I’m clearly the only one in this marriage who sees through my mother’s games.
So, I’m going to officially wash my hands of this entire fiasco.
“You have the pamphlet, you have your money, and you have my word that I’m done with it. Whatever you decide to do, just… keep me out of it.”
Neither of us speaks after that. Not even once we’re home and in bed. Like so many things lately, this disagreement feels like it’s sucked just a little more life out of us.
Out of our marriage.
And if I’m honest, I’m not sure how many times we can keep bouncing back.
Chapter Ten
Blue
The crowd cheers, I clap out of habit, but I’m someplace else entirely.
Going multiple days existing under the same roof with someone you’ve hardly spoken to takes its toll, I guess.
The argument about my mother just sort of erased what little progress West and I made, sending us right back where we started. Or maybe I’m wrong about that. Maybe we’re actually worse off than before.
Honestly, had it not been for every gossip outlet already having a field day with our private life, I probably would’ve skipped today’s game. But they don’t need more ammunition than they already have. Between our fertility struggles and West’s past with Coach’s daughter,allof it is just kindling for the fire. They haven’t let up, and I’m sure that’s trickled down to the team. West hardly says two words to me when he gets in from practice, but if he did, I’m positive at least half the shit he’d tell me would be about how weird things have gotten with the guys.
