“And then we’ll just”—I gesture between us—“get divorced?”
Another nod. Like this is some business deal with an exit clause instead of my life he’s casually slotting into a timeline.
How does he not understand what he’s asking of me?
My blood boils. “Are you kidding me? Matt, you’re not Thomas Smith from some small town no one’s ever heard of. You’re Matthew fucking Grayson. Nothing in your life stays quiet. You don’t just get married and divorced, then, poof—everything goes away and is fine.”
His jaw tics.
“Listen.” I hold up a finger. “One, I don’twantto be divorced. I’ve been waiting my whole damn life to get married, so when I do? I’m not just…getting a divorce.Two, this will beeverywhere.Magazine articles. Tabloids. Paparazzi. Gossip columns.” I huff out a breath. “And don’t even get me started on my family. The Greek community.”
I pause, my head spinning, and it’snotthe wine. “You’re not just asking me to get married and divorced. You’re asking me to put my life on hold. No dating. No moving forward. No getting closer to actually finding the one. God, I just?—”
“I know this is a lot to ask,” he says again, cutting me off. “Too much. But I’m not asking…” His eyes redden, his voice catching as he shakes his head. “I wouldn’t ask this for just me. I’m asking for Cole.”
The way his voice cracks on that last word grips my heart, pressure squeezing tight as I watch the man I know so well fight not to break in the middle of a steakhouse.
“Don’t do it for me,” he says. “Do it for him. Please, Jordan. I’m not reckless. You know I’d never ask something like this unless I was desperate.” His breath shudders. “Please. Don’t say no. Not yet. Just… sit on it.”
His words smooth over every rational thought, like a Band-Aid slapped over a bleeding wound. His eyes are soft, pleading.
Matt doesn’tplead.
“Do you know what the last thing he said to me was?” he asks quietly.
“What?” I whisper.
“He begged me to take him with me.Begged.” His jaw tightens as he takes a deep inhale. “Looked me straight in the eyes and said, through tears,please take me with you.It gutted me, babe.” He pauses, collecting himself. “He doesn’t want this. He wants to be with me. He just lost his dad, Jordan. The least I can do is fight to give him the best damn life I can.”
He scoffs, eyes dropping to his empty glass. “And me being a single guy with a busy life is going to bury me as a viable option before the judge even considers me.”
My brows knit together. “What about Cole? Did you think about what this would do to him?”
He startles. “Babe, I just said?—”
“I don’t mean the custody. I mean, theafterpart. What happens after we get divorced? Have you thought about what that would do to him? Cole likes me. You get custody, and then suddenly I’m gone.” I shrug. “That feels like it could be tough on him.”
His chest rises. “No,” he admits. “I didn’t think about that. But it’s better than the alternative. Isn’t it? You’ll still be in his life. He could see you anytime.”
“Matt.” I shake my head, my body physically rejecting the idea. But for reasons I can’t even begin to explain, I pause to consider.
What it would mean for Cole.
For Nate.
For Matt.
And inevitably, what it would mean for me.
What would it look like to be married to Matt?
There was a time I thought about that more than I’d ever admit.
But now all I can see is the fallout. My family. The Greek community. The shit people would say, especially so soon after Richard. They’d assume I left him for Matt. Hell, they’d assume I was with Matt before I ever walked away.
And my dating life? Gone. Over. Done.
I lock my gaze with his. “I went out with someone last weekend. He kissed me. My family knows.” My heart races.Why am I even entertaining this?“How does that work if we’re engaged?”
