“I hope so.” I rub a hand over the back of my neck. “I panicked a little when he asked about school nights.”
And when you told him you didn’t love Richard the way you loved me.
I flash her a smile.
She said what she said. Maybe it was for show. Maybe she felt that way then. It doesn’t mean she feels that way now.
And even if she did?
It doesn’t matter.
She’s not here for that. We didn’t get married for any of those reasons. She’s here for Cole.
And she’s made that very clear.
“You did great.” She pushes away from the door and walks toward me, sliding her hands around my back. “I think you were genuine and honest, and that always counts for something.” She tilts her chin, and says softly, “I think Cole is very lucky to have an Uncle Matt.”
But then she does this kind of shit. She says things that stir up old feelings. Hugs me like this. Looks at me in this way that brings that stupid fucking lump to my throat. She makes me feel things I don’t want to.
The only good thing about it is that it reminds me I’mnothinglike my father.
“What time are you wanting to leave today?” She stares up at me, but for the life of me I can’t answer. Not without giving it away.
That I’m feeling shit.
That I’m struggling.
With all of it.
She brought this up the night I asked her to marry me. She expressed her concern about how splitting up after all this might affect Cole.
But what I didn’t take into account?
How it might affectme.
How it always affects me after she’s gone.
Jesus. Jensen was right.
My little plan sucks.
I clear my throat, forcing my gaze onto the microwave clock. “I can wrap up around four, I think. We can head out shortly after.”
“Good. Because I need to start packing tonight.” She drums her palms against my chest excitedly. We leave for Switzerland Fridayafter work. “I can’t wait for the benefit. The dress I bought is incredible. And the shoes are even better.”
I chuckle, stepping away from her. “Can you please just do me a favor and not take an oversized suitcase? You know Zermatt isn’t easy to get around with luggage.”
Her eyes go wide. “What? We’re going to Zermatt? I thought we were just doing Zurich.”
“Ah, did I forget to tell you that’s where the benefit is?” I shrug. “Must have slipped my mind.”
She squeals. “Oh my God! I’m so excited. I love Zermatt.”
“I know. That’s why I didn’t tell you. Much more fun this way,” I say grinning. I make my way to the fridge and grab a sparkling water. “I’ve got to get back to my office. Be ready at four?”
“I’ll be ready.”
Chapter Thirty-Four
