Leaping from my couch, I hurried toward the authority of letters. I requested copies of all the letters we received last week. Despite reviewing each one, nothing appeared suspicious.
So what was she worried about? Was it about my talking to her?
She didn’t seem unhappy while talking to me; she only appeared irritated, which I liked because it distracted her from the past. Now she was doing better. She seemed more engaged in her work and needed me less. My teasing and irritation were other reasons she distanced herself from me, which benefited her.
At that moment, a relationship was the most harmful thing for her. Thus, I perceived my disloyal reputation and flirting as useful. This meant she wouldn't develop feelings for me if she kept getting annoyed with me.
However, something felt off about her today.
I returned to my chamber and lay on my bed, trying to sleep. However, I couldn’t, as thoughts of her battles and struggles swirled in my mind. I meant a woman who they forced and then abandoned, and who couldn’t truly live happily. How could anyone expect her to forget and be happy so easily?
No matter how much you run, your past always runs along behind you.
I palmed my face, unable to catch sleep, and finally gave up.
After taking a quick bath, I started writing letters to all the guests for the baby’s sixth-day feast. However, in the back of my mind, I couldn’t shake the image of that day when she was crying in my arms and then her refusal to live as a normal woman. It just wouldn’t leave my mind; it kept hindering me.
Once I was done with the letters, I stepped outside to check on the preparations. Yet, unconsciously, my eyes searched for her. In the kitchen, I scanned all the women: short frame, honey skin, wavy hair, a big smile, beautiful red lips, a mole on her right cheek, and another on the left side of her neck. She wore two red bangles on each wrist, had a tiny waist and a slim belly, and would show her frustration when she sensed my presence.
But even as the sun sank below the horizon, the winds turned chilly, the insects emerged, and the birds returned to their nests, I couldn’t find her.
With each passing moment, my heart beat a little faster at the thought of all the potential things that might have happened to her, rendering her unavailable.
What if she got hurt, sick, tense, depressed, or crying?
Oh no! No, no… that can’t happen.
As evening descended, I returned to my chamber. Rubbing my face, I sank into the couch and pondered ways to find her.
Did she go to visit her family? Still, there was no letter.
Suddenly, a thought popped into my mind, and I clapped twice. An attendant walked in, and I looked at her.
“I want dinner,” I said, and she nodded before leaving.
I smiled.She’ll come now.
I reminded myself to take a quick bath and change into my nightclothes: a simple dhoti and a loose white kurta. After bathing, I settled back onto the couch and waited for her.
However, time appeared to move slowly.
I gazed at my dagger impatiently, beginning to draw it from the sheath, only to push it back in. My eyes studied it intently, yet my mind focused on the image of her face I had seen just before she fled.
I immediately lifted my gaze to the entrance when I heard footsteps approaching. A slight smile appeared on my face, but it dropped as soon as I saw an unfamiliar face. I felt a strange ache in my heart.
“Prince, dinner.”
“Take it back,” I replied faster than I expected, glancing at the puzzled attendant retrieving the plate.
I bit my lower lip in confusion. Maybe she was busy and didn’t realise I had asked for dinner, so she didn’t come.
I stood up and pulled out a book to pass the time. I started with the first word of each page and promised myself that I would call for dinner when I finished the first page.
I started reading, but I could hardly focus. I finished the page and then clapped again.
Another attendant arrived.“I want dinner now,” I requested, remaining polite, as I had already been rude to someone else. She bent down and nodded before leaving.
After trying to concentrate for a while, I heard footsteps. I gulped and looked toward the entrance, and as soon as I saw the face, I sighed in frustration.
