?????
15. Suman
With my flushed cheeks, I looked in the mirror to see myself one last time before heading to the door. But my gaze lingered on the faint bruise on my neck.
My fingers brushed it, rubbing my skin in anticipation, and I inhaled sharply in confusion.
This was unexpected.
Did something happen?
I lowered my gaze to check my hands, legs, back, and shoulders, and aside from this bruise, there wasn’t a single mark on me, triggering a memory that clouded my mind.
His lips were on my neck.
The intensity of his breath, the grip of his hands, and the warm moisture between my legs—everything felt too fast, yet too slow. It seemed like we had spent just a few moments together, yet my memory captured every detail in thousands of images.
His swollen lips, lustful green eyes, the touch of his fingers on my core—everything was overwhelming.
“Suman!”
Daadi-sa’s voice pulled me from my thoughts.
Gulping nervously, I moved toward the door while draping my dupatta over my head. I covered the bright red mark with the hem as much as possible.
Inhaling deeply to muster courage, I placed my palms on the handle and opened the door.
Daadi-sa’s eyes shifted from frustration to shock, then quickly to awe.
Her eyes filled with tears as she cupped my cheeks and kissed my forehead.
“You look breathtaking. Forget this soldier; let me find you a prince,”
A wave of laughter swept through the attendants, watching us, tightening my heart with her words. The laughter faded from my mind, but I forced a smile onto my face.
“Come with me,” she said, leading me out. She asked me to sit on the couch.
I watched her retrieve minimal jewellery for me, a beautiful smile gracing her lips. She sat beside me on the couch, extending her hand to hold mine.
Starting with the bangles, she said,“I know it didn't go as planned last time, but nothing is more beautiful than having hope.”
I gulped and bit my lip.
I understood that hope could be beautiful yet also bring immense pain, often more than reality.
“Hope is beautiful, Daadi-sa, but when it shatters, the world feels too big to escape. It feels like being trapped in a box, suffocated. Trusting again becomes incredibly difficult,” I explained slowly, and she lifted her gaze to meet mine.
“I know how it feels when hope dies. I was married to him, spending my life managing the kingdom and politics while he was busy with the same until his last breath. When everything settled, the children married, grandchildren blessed our lives, I thought we would enjoy our old age in peace, but he left me alone.”
I lowered my gaze, listening to her. Her fingers trembled with the frailty of old age, yet hope shone brightly in her eyes.
“And when I was finally recovering from his loss, making peace with life again, Raj left us,” she continued, tears welling in her eyes, and I felt a lump forming in my throat. I gently held her hands, caressing them slowly.
“But sometimes, we’re so consumed by the wildfire that we fail to realise it brings new seeds to grow, new lives to begin, and new greenery to flourish in our lives,”
She smiled weakly, and I tried to smile back.
“You are too young to give up on life, Suman,” she added.“You did your best. While he was alive, you stayed by his side, even when he chose someone else over you. You never cheated, disrespected, or hurt him. Now that he is gone, you are not burdened, and you are young enough to believe in love again.”
