“Your idea to fight.”
“Okay, okay. Maybe I overreacted. A bit.”
“A lot.” We were both grinning now, and some of the tension lifted from my shoulders.
“As I was saying,” he continued, “I was thinking about why you would do that, and then you told me you were upset that Volks said Nova was special. So…I think maybe you have feelings for Nova. Feelings you might have been trying to deny.”
“Shit.” I lowered my head into my hands. Dan patted my back and then slipped his fingers into my hair and pulled harshly. “What the fuck!” I dropped my hands, glaring at him.
“No point hiding when I already know your secret.”
Exhaling heavily, I turned to him. Denying things to myself, keeping it all inside for so long…I could admit now that it was killing me. I trusted Dan with my life, and he was probably the only person I could speak to about this. “This goes no further.”
“It’s in a lockbox buried six feet under in a haunted graveyard on a remote island off the coast of Scotland, with deadly sharks patrolling the waters,” he said.
“Uhhh…that’s weirdly specific. Okay, yeah. You’re right. I know it sounds fucked up, but I tried to convince myself I hated her, because I knew about the arrangement with Volkov, and I knew it was hopeless. It’s too— I couldn’t be around her without wanting her. It was the only way. Now with this engagement, I’m seeing?—”
“Everything you want for yourself happening to Volkov?” Dan nodded. “I get it. You know, trying to gaslight yourself into believing you’re not into her is pointless.”
“Thanks. I know that.”
“Hating your teammate is also unfair. You know he didn’t have a choice, either.”
“He— If he’d really wanted to, he could’ve managed to get out of it.”
Dan’s brows pulled together. “I dunno. He’s the Pakhan’s son. He has expectations placed on him too. And don’t forget, the Volkovs want this agreement as much as the Thorpes. They need the port access, and this marriage is insurance.”
“I hate that you’re making sense.” I sighed. “Anyway, it still doesn’t discount the fact that Volkov is an asshole, rubbing it in my face that he owns my family. Reminding me he’s the one who’s gonna be marrying Nova.”
“Oh, shit… He knows you’re into her, then?”
“Yeah. I thought I’d hidden it, but you and him both guessed, so…”
“Not sure I would’ve noticed if I hadn’t seen you chaseher into the woods and then become besties with my nemesis. You haven’t hidden your dislike of Volks very well, but I know you have a bit of a weird thing with the Volkovs with the clinic, so I thought it might’ve been to do with that.” He studied me carefully. “What about Nova? Is she into you?”
“Uh…” Scrubbing my hand over my face, I grimaced. I could feel my cheeks warming. Maybe she hated me a bit less now, but she wasn’t into me. Yeah, there had been that moment after the fight, but we were both amped up on adrenaline, and I was sure she’d resented it. Resentedme. “I don’t know…no. She isn’t.”
His eyes widened. “Shit, Banks. Have you two fucked?”
“No!”
“But you’ve done something.”
I nodded slowly. “Yeah. It was stupid, I know. And it was all my fault. She wasn’t to blame in any way. I should’ve stayed away from her. But afterwards, I said… We agreed I’d stay away from her. She’s engaged now, and I can’t—wouldn’t put her in any danger because I can’t control myself.”
Dan whistled through his teeth. “You’re fucked, mate.”
“Thanks. I know that.”
“This whole thing is messed up. Her having to marry Volksy in the first place. Yeah, from a business perspective, it makes sense, but it’s like someone forcing me to marry…uhhh…”
“Bellingham?” I suggested with a smirk, and he shrieked in protest and punched me. I laughed, holding up my hands. “Just kidding. But going back to the Volkovs. That’s another thing I wanted to speak to you about. Priya let me know they’ve been coming around the clinic again, trying to assert their control.”
His eyes narrowed. “What the fuck? They don’t own you.”
“No, but they think we still owe them, and on paper, they still have a minor stake. Too minor to assert any kind of control, but their names are listed.”
“Even so.”
