I’m unsafe.
I’m rotten.
Savage.
Fuck. I’m my father. At least he was a decent president.
I’m not even that.
Even writing this shit down feels like another burden I’m dumping on you. What the hell are you supposed to do with it?
Will you even read the words of a monster who’s nothing but a self-hating bastard now?
Selfish. Every word here is selfish, Charlotte. Just another selfish attempt.
I may be a man in age, but inside I’m still that resentful seventeen-year-old who couldn’t welcome his own damn sister into his life. I never gave us a chance because our father didn’t.
Fuck. Now I’m blaming him when he’s nothing but a drooling asshole sitting downstairs in a wheelchair that can’t move without help.
I’m the one to blame.
I followed the club bylaws when I could’ve broken them for you.
Why didn’t I break them for you?
Adding another word, Charlotte.
Coward.
That’s your brother. A coward. Hell—I’m not even your brother, am I?
Shit. I hope you never read this. Because there’s no explanation here. No excuse. No trait to blame.
I’m the rot that let you down.
All me. Not our father. Not stupidity. Not some excuse about being young and angry and too damn proud
Just me.
But there’s one thing I do want you to know.
I’ll learn to be better. I’ll become the brother I never was.
You deserve that.
I don’t deserve you, but I swear it anyway.
I’ll be that brother.
Even if it’s from a distance. Even if the only thing you ever allow me to be is someone who makes sure you’re safe from far away.
I’ll be that person.
I’ll become him.
Please.
- Dane
